The M Chronicles: Mischief and Mayhem

Cheerwine Cupcakes (qty. 15-18)

2011-09-19T14:25:00.000-07:00

Cheerwine used was cane sugar version (in 12oz glass bottles). I used 3 TB of Droste cocoa powder but recommend 2, as the chocolate flavor overpowered the Cheerwine and made it hard to detect. The cakes turned out really moist, which was fabulous, but the frosting was a little runny. I recommend using 3 egg whites. The recipes have been modified to reflect my recommendations.

3/4 cup granulated sugar
1/4 cup brown sugar
1 1/2 cups white all-purpose flour
2 tablespoons cocoa powder
1 teaspoon baking soda
1/4 teaspoon salt
2 teaspoons vanilla
1 tablespoon white vinegar
1 1/2 sticks butter, softened at room temperature
12 ounces Cheerwine

Preheat oven to 350 degrees F. Grease muffin tin and set aside.

Combine first 5 ingredients in large bowl. Add vanilla, vinegar, and butter; combine well. Slowly stir in Cheerwine; beat until smooth.
Pour into muffin tin and bake for 15-17 minutes, or until a toothpick inserted in the center comes out clean. Cool in pan for 10 minutes. Finish cooling on wire rack.

Frosting
1 1/2 cups granulated sugar
3 egg whites
12 ounces Cheerwine
1/2 teaspoon almond flavoring

Combine sugar and egg whites in top of double boiler. Add Cheerwine and beat on low speed until blended.
Place over boiling water. Beat constantly on high speed until stiff peaks form. Remove from heat. Add flavoring and beat until frosting is thick enough to spread.

Oatmeal Creme Pies

2011-09-16T07:20:00.000-07:00

All of the following ingredients are organic. I purchased all my supplies from Weaver Street Market in Hillsborough.

Cookie dough:
3/4 cup butter, softened at room temperature
2 cups brown sugar
3 large eggs
1/2 teaspoon sea salt
2 cups white whole wheat flour
1 teaspoon baking powder
1 1/4 teaspoon ground cinnamon
2 1/2 cups oven-toasted oats (I used Country Choice)
2 teaspoons baking soda
3 tablespoons boiling water (nuked in a measuring glass in the microwave)

Creme:
1 tablespoon unflavored pectin
1/3 cup water
3/4 cup cane sugar
1/2 cup light corn syrup
1/4 cup water (do not combine with the 1/3 cup above)
2 teaspoons vanilla extract
1 cup powdered sugar
8 ounces vegetable shortening

_______________________________________________________________________________

Preheat oven to 425 F. Lightly grease baking sheet and set aside.

COOKIES:
Cream butter, sugar, and eggs in large bowl. In separate bowl, sift together salt, flour, and baking powder. Add to creamed mixture. Add cinnamon and oats. Mix well. In small dish, add baking soda to boiling water, then stir the mixture into the batter. Drop by ping-pong ball size (1 1/2 TB?) onto baking sheets, keeping them about 2 inches apart. Bake about 8-10 minutes. Let cookies cool completely on a wire rack.

CREME:
In small measuring cup, combine pectin with 1/3 cup cold water. Let stand, stirring once. In saucepan over medium-high heat, stir together cane sugar, corn syrup, and 1/4 cup water until blended. Continuing to stir, raise heat to high and bring to full boil. Continue boiling for 15 seconds. Immediately remove from heat and stir in pectin mixture until well blended. Transfer all contents to large bowl. Add vanilla. With mixer on medium, beat for about 20 seconds. Gradually raise speed to high and beat until mixture is cooled to barely warm, about 5-7 minutes. Reduce mixer speed to low and slowly add powdered sugar. Add shortening and beat until completely smooth.

Hong Kong: Part 1

2011-05-24T18:00:00.001-07:00

a journey born from emotion

Today's trip to Hong Kong I will remember as a collection of emotional experiences joining together rather than simply a day I took a long plane ride to China. It started out as a day of rebirth, one where the open windows and slices of sunshine framed by the new Beastie Boys left me feelng empowered as I drove to the airport. The smell of fresh tar mixed with magnolias. After checking in and sitting down at the gate, three peeps from the San Diego Surfrider Foundation sat down next to me and started chatting about their projects amongst themselves. Fueled by their passion and my recent donation to the Cape Fear chapter, daydreams of early mornings bathed in cresting waves of saltwater filled by head. I caught myself smiling with tears dancing in my eyes. I belonged there. As we all were landing at Chicago, the familiar surroundings left me wistful. Yes, I've been here dozens of times before. Yes, this used to be my home. I used to fly out of here all the time. But it's not my home anymore. It feels strange and detached. I used to be a part of this place, but I left and have no desire to return. What fantastic memories I harbor from my days growing up here, but they'll always be just memories.

I'm convinced anyone who watched me for the next 16 hours as I flew from ORD to HKG will believe I'm a basketcase. I finished Garth Stein's "The Art of Racing in the Rain" by the time we reached Alaska, and I cried no less than three times. Not only because the scribblings from the pen were brilliant and such a familiar style to my own, but also because the philosophical discussions were aligned with so many of thoughts with which I have wrestled, viewpoints so close to my own. I finished the book with such a wide smile on my face only to distract myself with watching an uber-silly rom-com with Owen Wilson and Reese Witherspoon to cry at the Play-Doh scene. Dammit. To then listen to music via my iPod I hadn't listened to before brought upon another moment of waterworks. I'm telling you. I was unstoppable today. Emo central.

As I was getting off the plane a little Indian toddler who had been throwing glances my way the entire trip locked eyes with me. I smiled warmly at him, returning his gaze. Never breaking eye contact, he gave me the widest smile he could muster before he turned around to hug his dad's leg.

Crawled through immigration, picked up my bag, and hopped the 30 min cab ride to the hotel. Along the way I was met by a smattering of ships, the machination of steel, concrete, and glass as they reached toward the sky arms outstretched to grasp a magnificent rainbow. Mountains of green danced before my eyes, and I felt myself memorizing the lines that bobbled about like an irregular heartbeat before diving below sight's horizon. I wondered how I'd feel today had RMJM hired me as their CFO many moons ago to manage the finances of their architectural design firm.

Handing/receiving with two hands returned automatically, without realizing what I had done until after the event.

Upon checking in at the hotel a shower hadn't felt as refreshing in months. A catharsis of sorts of the day's events and thoughts swirling about my head. Felt energized to slip alongside my OneMBA global cohorts at the Sha Tin bar to catch up and mingle over mojitos as a lounge singer crooned Sting's "Fields of Gold." Today I left myself wide open to emotion, and events came together in a framework as such. I'm not just running this path; I AM this path

We kick off at 9:30am tomorrow morning! Can't wait to see the entire OneMBA faculty!

.

To land that dream job, offer a peek into your soul

2010-07-09T19:00:00.000-07:00

Want to work for a small company or an entity that is anything but corporate? So how do you stand out in an age where you just click "attach" and "send"? How do you make it past the first gate? Video resumes and clever digital portfolios may work if you're vying for a seat at a creative company, but what if you're not pursuing an opportunity in the arts or social media?

I don't believe the resume matters nearly as much as most people think it should. Most competing for a position will possess roughly the same qualifications despite different backgrounds. Overall I find the playing field fairly level. A computer program scans your submitted resume for specific key words, or a busy human in HR spends little more than 30-60 seconds ingesting your geek cred. So is the key to shorten and sweeten, to load that resume full of key words you know HR will seek? I say NO. If it would be that easy, don't you think everyone else would be doing the exact same thing? So then how would you be different from all the other candidates? I say quit focusing on the resume so much.

As corny and perhaps strange as it may sound, I'm convinced an unconventional cover letter is the golden ticket. You read that right: unconventional. I'm not talking about that formal, standardized, snoozy-worthy cover letter whose cookie cutter format may be grammatically correct and may even summarize your accomplishments succinctly. I know we've all read those and likely have written quite a few of them ourselves. No doubt that at some point during our days of youth an academic of higher authority drilled some kind of formula into our noggins for that "perfect" cover letter. And perhaps that may have worked two decades ago.

But in today's electronic age, no one has a chance to analyze penmanship or critique choice of paper stock. The human touch has been lost in a sea of 0s and 1s. While we seek outlets to personalize experiences within digital spaces in social media, our cover letters attached to our resumes still often read robotic, devoid of spirit, of human emotion...that is, if we submit a cover letter at all. I say: offer a peek into your soul. Write a letter that truly reflects who you are. Forget the rules, write from the heart, and see where it goes. You may be surprised.

You see, when I was seeking a change in career from accounting and finance several years ago in favor of CRM as an account director, I knew the odds were stacked tall against me. My background, save for five years very early in my career, screams entirely accounting, auditing, finance, and project management. And you know how extroverted and charismatic many of us accountants are! Wooo...give us some rum punch, and we're all but busting out our calculators to figure out which asset gives us the greatest return. An HR director at an advertising agency would take one look at my resume, scratch his/her head wondering if I had applied to the wrong position at the wrong company, then click "delete". That's what I would EXPECT. Wouldn't you? So I decided to offer up something unexpected, at least from an accountant. No, I didn't rewrite my resume and weight it with all the marketing-related work I had done in my finance positions. I wrote an unconventional cover letter.

And it got me not only an interview, but two other interviews afterwards. I didn't end up taking the job, but I did get to meet five people in an industry I was trying to get into. About a year later, when I was applying for a Marketing Director role, I tweaked my letter a bit further (it's the letter that follows this post). Not only did I land the interview, I was called back for a second round and then offered the position. I'm convinced my resume was a minor player in these two instances, as my professional background was not what had been listed in the job description. In fact, I was told my compelling cover letter was why they called in the first place.

But writing an unconventional cover letter isn't necessarily just for marketing and sales careers. I tailored that same cover letter I had penned for the advertising agency to the craft beer industry, and I'm convinced it played a key role in my beating out 203 other candidates for a senior accounting gig at a popular craft brewer. Unconventional cover letter + accounting? Is that not worth a second look?

Look, I'm not completely off my rocker with idealism. There will be companies who will never read your quirky cover letter or may pass it off as unprofessional or as ill fit to the corporate culture. Fine. They did you a favor. Would you want to work at a place where you'll be ignored or seen as weird anyway?

Likewise, if you can't see yourself taking the time and going through the pains of writing a thought-out, personal cover letter for a company, you probably don't really want to work there anyway.

And that's how I see it.

My cover letter for the Marketing Director role:

Passion. That is the only way I can describe what I feel for the type of work you do at XXXXXXXXX. I possess a marketer's heart and creativity, as well as a financial accountant's brain and tenacity. Needless to say, the juxtaposition of the two facets certainly keeps things interesting inside my head. As a dedicated and analytically-minded professional with a successful career in financial management, I have built a solid foundation using my left brain, the brain that grew up concocting chemistry experiments in her parents' garage during her days of youth; the brain that entered every grade school mathematics competition she could get her hands on; the brain that pursued truth through weaving a fabric of scientific formulas with the thread of meticulous detail.

But something was....and is...still missing. The thirst for artistic creation still lingers in the recesses of my throat. My entrepreneurial zeal is begging for release.

The Director of Marketing opportunity would be a mutually fantastic fit. As I come from a financial background, I know and understand your target market well and have numerous established connections throughout the globe. I have already completed much of the research by having taken the lead with financial software implementation solutions for several entities, including the American Marketing Association’s Triangle Chapter. I speak the XXXXXXXX language in a way your target market will understand and appreciate. Likewise, this position would allow me to complete my transition from finance to marketing full circle. As I mention in my article “From Beans to Brands” (http://embatalk.com/index.php/homepage/posts?post=beans-to-brands), I’ve been trying to change the course of a ship with all the rope I can muster. I am currently taking MBA classes to complete a second top-tier focus in marketing (I already earned my MBA in 2008 with Global Business Administration as my focus) and have earned high marks in Pricing this spring of 2009. Strategic Brand Management is next on the docket. I would love the opportunity to apply my lessons to a technology and solutions package that runs in my blood. I have the tools. I’m ready to use them.

I write to you today to engage in further conversation. To give you an idea of some of my capabilities, I have attached my resumé for your review. Highlights of my credentials and aspects of my background pertaining directly to this position include:
• Managing budgeting, accounting and finance functions, and contributing vitally to the business plans and growth strategy of rapidly growing small business entities.
• Playing a key part in implementing project-management-based software, as well as training and coaching staff members on its use.
• Five years of retail management and banquet facility sales with a laser focus on measuring merchandising effectiveness, sales of high-ticket items, and market penetration.
• Revising accounting systems to streamline operations, promote cost efficiency and bolster cash flow management practices.
• Graduating from the OneMBA program at Kenan-Flagler Business School (UNC-CH) with Beta Gamma Sigma honors. Top grade of the class in statistics and microeconomics.
• Earning a Bachelor of Arts degree in Accounting and Business Management with academic distinction (3.93/4.00 GPA) in just three and a half years.
• Earning highly esteemed Brand Advocate status in manufacturing and a highly coveted spot on the Executive Leadership team for the American Marketing Association Triangle Chapter.

While I am confident I would add to the competency and knowledge base of your team, I also feel I could further develop both my left and right brains to their fullest potential. A versatile, diligent and creative individual, I am eager to explore opportunities for supporting brand management development and execution. Nothing excites me more than a fast-paced entrepreneurial environment!

Please consider the value that I would bring to XXXXXXXX, and be sure to visit my profile on LinkedIn at http://www.linkedin.com/in/agm1127 for my recommendations. Feel free to contact me with any questions you may have. I certainly hope to have the opportunity to discuss my qualifications, dreams, and innovative ideas in the near future. Thank you for your consideration.

Sincerely,
Audra G. Marotta

Win a seat to the Triangle AMA May Luncheon - 2010: The Year of Mobile Marketing!

2010-04-29T10:53:00.000-07:00

Still pumped about the conversations resulting from her Ignite Sussex presentation "A QWERTY Love Letter to Rehoboth", your trusty Triangle AMA Treasurer was more than a little excited to purchase a seat to the upcoming May 20th AMA luncheon at Brier Creek entitled "2010: The Year of Mobile Marketing".

But alas, she will be out of town during the event. Rather than cancel her reservation, she decided to donate it to one lucky Triangle area marketer. Who will that marketer be? Will it be you?

In 50 words or less email your best mobile marketing tip to audra@violent-orchid.com. Deadline for submissions is 5:00pm on Monday, May 10th. The winner will be selected by the luncheon mobile marketing panelists and moderator. The winner will be announced on Wednesday, May 12th and recognized at the May 20th luncheon.

The complete list of eligible entries will be provided as a link on the Triangle AMA website. The link will be shared at the May 20th luncheon and available for viewing during and after the luncheon. If you have any questions, please feel free to email audra@violent-orchid.com

Good luck! Looking forward to your entries!

Cicerone Beer Off-Flavors Tasting Class Friday, July 23rd (2pm) at Fullsteam Brewery!

2010-04-06T19:10:00.000-07:00

I am organizing a Cicerone beer education seminar to be held at Fullsteam Brewery (726 Rigsbee in Durham) on Friday, July 23rd at 2pm. A description of the course per the cicerone.org website follows:

"A new online learning program that teaches you to recognize common beer off-flavors. This class takes a novel approach to online learning by linking standardized tasting materials shipped to you in advance of the class with an online lecture to help you learn. When you register for this course, you will receive calibrated tasting spikes that you add to beer to quickly and easily create off-flavor samples for the tutored tasting session.

The 75-minute class will cover:

Tasting technique
Flavor variations: fruity flavor
Discussion and tasting of 5 key off-flavors:

DMS

Diacetyl

Oxidized

Acetlaldehyde

Infection "

The cost of the course is $35.00 and will cover supplies and beer, as well as the following:

A PDF copy of the lecture slides
Online lecture with tasting (approximately 75 minutes)
Recommended additional tasting exercises
Access to the recorded lecture for review

All you need to do is show up and be ready to learn!

Since I have to order seats ahead of time in six-person chunks, deadline for registration is JULY 8TH. Payment may be Paypaled to me at audra_gaizak@yahoo.com, or I will gladly accept cash at the time you make your reservation.

The gang at Fullsteam and I are looking forward to hosting you! Feel free to email me any questions at audragmarotta at yahoo dot com or call me at 919-538-4404. Cheers!

Audra's Ode to Dogfish, Woody Guthrie style....

2009-11-30T15:18:00.000-08:00

Back in October, there was a lil' songwriting contest we had here at Dogfish. Here was the narrative behind the diddy, in our fabulous brewceptionist Nora's words:

Attention Dogfish Head Closet Songwriters: Time To Get Your Woody On!!
You’ve seen Woody’s likeness on our labels, posters, etc., and you’ve sang This Land is Your Land a hundred gazillion times but did you know…
HE WAS A HOMEBREWER?
According to Sam, Woody was not just the Father of the American Protest Song, he was the Father of Extreme Home brewing!

So here’s the deal…

Write a song Woody style about Dogfish! It can be about the brewery, the pub, brewing, anything that reflects this awesome organization! Submit your songs to me on or before November 13, 2009. Qualified participants will each receive a prize. One Grand Prize Winner will be selected by Sam the Man himself!

I decided to enter, especially since it had been a while since I let my creative juices flow.....

Lo and behold, guess who won? YES!! I was so excited Mr. Sam Calagione himself chose my bitty words of songdom. Good thing I didn't have to sing them...let's just say my mom's superior vocal genes weren't passed on to me. How was it exactly my husband described my singing....oh, right! LIKE A CAT DYING.

Anyhoo, I wanted to share!

1. Sam's comment on my lyrics: "Very original--Woodesque without covering his song--like slap the booty part."
2. My contest winning "Ode to Dogfish". Enjoy! Would love to hear your feedback!

Ode to Dogfish by Audra

Gather round the fire, y’all
For this song of lore
‘Bout a group of rebel misfits
On the Del’ware shore.
We brew to the extreme, man
Make no apologies.
Off-centered’s where it’s at, man
At 65 degrees.

Chorus:
We got big balls of bocce,
We mash it in the tun.
We rock sofa king hoppy,
And when the day is done
We Randall us some Chic’ry
N’ sport some Palo wood
We blame it on the 60,
Sh*t, life is pretty good!

The brewers work their magic
With coffee, grapes, and beets,
Raspberries and peaches
Cocoa, cloves, and wheat
And Dogfish would be nowhere
Without our cellar crew,
packaging and warehouse,
Maint’nence, QC too.

Chorus:
We got big balls of bocce,
We mash it in the tun.
We rock sofa king hoppy,
And when the day is done
We Randall us some Chic’ry
N’ sport some Palo wood
We blame it on the 60,
Sh*t, life is pretty good!

Sah’tea, Squall N’ Theo
Burton, Black N’ Blue,
Pangaea, Olde School Barley
Immort, World Wide too.
We spit into your Chicha
And Fort into your glass
Our ninety minute IPA
Can eas’ly kick your….(nothing sung, you slap your own booty)

Chorus:
We got big balls of bocce,
We mash it in the tun.
We rock sofa king hoppy,
And when the day is done
We Randall us some Chic’ry
N’ sport some Palo wood
We blame it on the 60,
Sh*t, life is pretty good!

Yeah, life is pretty good!

Since my last post....

2009-11-01T19:48:00.000-08:00

I have moved from NC to DE, wrangled myself a cute little beach house for the winter (complete with more horseshoe crabs than I can shake a stick at), and now work for..............

Yeah, you can say not much has happened. :) More later, promise.

Should we adopt these recommendations in 2009?

2009-08-19T17:55:00.000-07:00

I am a numbers junkie; the need for a fix lives on

2009-08-06T17:48:00.001-07:00

I'm missing certain aspects of accounting. The general ledger is a beautiful thing. I miss appropriate revenue recognition. I miss calculating in-kind expenses. I miss prepaids. *sigh*

Thank goodness I have two boards where my services in accounting are needed.

I swear there are days where I am all about marketing and generating creative. Then there are others where a balance sheet serves as my lullaby.

My brain truly is juxtaposed. I feel like Jerrica Benton and Jem.

Writing Sample - Digital Artist Feature Introduction

2009-07-24T20:12:00.000-07:00

It comes as no surprise that the awe-inspiring advances made in digital technology the past fifteen years have impacted almost every major facet of our increasingly busier lives and remarkably shrinking worlds. Routines have been revised, methods have been reconsidered and thinking has been refreshed.

Technology's tentacles have also managed to wrap themselves around conventional art
forms such as painting, drawing, printing and photography, fusing them all together to create a new genre of art, one which was technically impossible to even fathom just a few short years back. With this new type of art has emerged a new kind of artist, one skilled in fusing conventional art forms with digital processing and
manipulation. Not only are these artists skilled with brushes, pencils, ink and lighting, but they are also proficient with the use of various software packages and computer equipment, utilizing them to enhance their current conventional skill sets. Three such top artists who have mastered this creative synthesis include ________. All three have been highly acclaimed as breakthrough creative experts within this realm of thriving art. A peek into each of their works makes it quite easy to discern why.

Writing Samples - Artist profiles

2009-07-24T19:37:00.001-07:00

I was commissioned by a Chicago-based art magazine to profile three mixed media artists. Below are two of my features. The first artist creates a lot of science fiction, H.R. Giger-inspired pieces. The second weaves juxtaposition and unexpected elements into a distinct style all his own. I have deleted the names, locations, images, and contact information for privacy and copyright purposes.

Artist 1

A futuristic fission of sanity, long-since oxidized by apathy, lies helpless by the side of the road, gasping desperately and seeing nothing. Welcome to the macabre, grotesque circus that lies within the shadowed recesses of ______-based ringmaster _________ mind. Unveil the velvet curtain, and one will find beauty in delusional vulgarity's essence, truth amidst the tarnished machinated perversions, and hope etched on innocence in scarlet letters by the hand of a rusty butcher knife and the blunted nails of betrayal. A distinct stench of the presence of purity exists within each of _____'s creations, though one will often find himself on a scavenger hunt through the thickets of the netherworld, warbling a swan song in a foreign tongue, in order to enlighten himself to embrace it. Passionate obsession personified, _______'s background is as varied and complex as his works, and one must submit himself completely in order to gain a greater understanding of this digital kingpin's evolution.
Before he ever picked up a camera, ______ was sculpting and drawing by the age of two. That was when he really started looking at things and translating what his impressions were into 2-d and 3-d renderings. At the same time, he grew a large fascination with the design, mechanics, and architecture of the human form. It was as if his working in clay or on paper were nothing more than notes on his observations. Even at such a tender age, he recalls living in awe with the idea that one could create something from nothing. _______ then started painting in his early pre-teen years and continued doing so for decades, though he was never quite happy with what he created, nor did his paintings turn out quite like he had envisioned. Painting simply left him exhausted. He then started photographing his models for his paintings with a Polaroid, and a short while later he stumbled upon digital photography. He discovered he was really happy with some of the images he was taking as "photographs" and then realized it was the photography that actually excited him. While his infatuation with photography grew, he was also playing around with photo manipulation using Photoshop. It was then that he realized through digital manipulation of all of these photographic elements, he didn't have to compromise anymore. Now he could illustrate exactly what was in his head. The painting was merely a stepping stone to the sector of art he felt he truly belonged. However, even with his photography he still feels the need to keep evolving, changing, and creating new pieces. Stagnant is simply not a word found in _______'s dictionary.
Influenced by such icons as Andy Warhol, Pablo Picasso, Max Ernst, Salvador Dali, Jackson Pollock, Helmut Newton, and J.K. Potter, _______ has always been fascinated by artists who bring something new and true to the table, artists who are honest with themselves and the world around them, artists who have something to say and who document themselves and their worlds. Through the aforementioned individuals ______ has learned to be true to himself, to realize who and what he is, and in turn, to stand proud.
As for where ______ draws his inspiration and motivation to create, he seeks everywhere from freeways to grocery stores. He walks around the street and soaks up humanity’s interactions with one another, their perceptions, their truths, and their lies, and he observes how individuals treat each other, as well as themselves. His art is simply a manifestation of who he watches and listens.
Of all the projects he has worked on over the years, _______ finds fine art to be his favorite. Typically the models find him through various media and desire to become a part of his personal, creative process. Restrictions are few, and the commitment to create something celebrated and profound is echoed loudly on both sides of the table. In turn, this sentiment brings a flourishing dynamic to the work, which money simply can not buy. ________ tends to flirt with extreme contrasts in his imagery, and in the end, if model and photographer mesh well together, a beauty and warmth is cast upon what would otherwise often be viewed as harsh and disturbing.
Other than ________’s website, his work may also be found in comic book shops. His extensive history with sculpting limited edition collectables for ____ ______ Comics has yielded him a number of honors, and to date he has created busts for _____ and the Matrix, as well as a limited edition bronze for one of Frank Frazetta’s paintings. For print or sculpture inquiries, _______ may be reached at __________________.
When he isn’t busy creating, ______ is busy observing, and he spends his free time doing both with the most feverish passion. His lofty level of unadulterated integrity heralds his reputation as one of the finest digital artists of today, as well as crowns him a prince in a dying breed of golden-hearted masters who create purely out of the love itself. Strange ways may make for strange days, but ________ takes the aesthetic to an entirely new level.

Artist 2

Very rarely does an artist come along these days whose style of shooting portraiture, fashion, or editorial is almost immediately recognizable, not only for the distinctive posing but also the framing and post-processing effects, most notably the latter. _____-based photographer and digital guru ______ is one of those few rare gems you stumble upon while wistfully combing the beaches in search of something radically different than the millions of grains of homogeneous sand that stretch on for seemingly endless miles. He has set himself far apart from the digital norm through his superior utilization of Photoshop and resulting images, which are truly unparalleled and unique to every degree. The highly-respected popularity of his work has even brought about the coining of a new phrase “_____-Style” within the booming industry. One visit to the Pandora’s Box that is his portfolio immediately pulls you into a visceral dreamscape of textures, hues, and emotions, lines between fantasy and reality blurred by the smudge of crimson lipstick and cotton candy whispers. His science fiction influences tend to mischievously hide around the corner and pop out at the opportune moment, when your imagination least expects it. In one deep breath you inhale a fragrant bouquet of contrasting moods, captivating stolen glances, complex erotic slivers, and animated psyches, but you can exhale only pure, utter admiration. How does one capture each of his subject’s personalities so keenly, so purely, so poignantly? We must venture deeper into the bellows of the creative chaotic abyss that is _______’s mind for a greater understanding of this digital sorcerer’s vision.
A long time ago in a galaxy too far away, before digital photography stormed the masses and into our frenetic and tumultuous everyday lives, ________ was studiously snapping away using film. He started out with black and white photography, processing his own prints and experimenting with various special effects and different chemical processes to see what would result. This eventually evolved into drawing directly on photographs with pencils, chalks, dyes, and airbrushing in between layers of lacquer. Influenced heavily by Picasso, Dali, Magritte, Esko, and Escher, ________ relied heavily upon his everyday life experiences as inspiration in creating each of his pieces. Then about eight years ago, while staying in Oregon, he found himself engrossed in an article about a new 2.5-megapixel digital camera that had just come out. The folds of his fascination got the better of him, and he ordered it from New York almost immediately. It was shipped to where he was staying in Oregon, and a week-long stay there turned into a two-and-a-half-month reverie. ________’s passionate love affair with digital photography had officially begun. The rest, quite simply, is history.
Though he works with Paint Shop Pro, various software packages, and plugins, 99% of what _______ creates is through Photoshop. Motivated by the end result, the aesthetic quality of the final version of an image, _______ often starts his model shoots without any preconceived notions. Often it is the collective bundle of the model’s makeup, wardrobe, mood, and personality that ______ uses as the canvas starting point, and the ideas rapidly evolve from there. It’s as if each shoot is personalized and tailored to the model to get the very best from him or her, whatever that may be in terms of fashion, science fiction, horror, nudes, commercial, and editorial work. What often starts as one type of shoot may rapidly switch tracks to another. Perhaps this is why we see such varied raw emotions from each of his models. It’s as if he just lets them go to see which direction they’ll turn.
Besides websites, one may find _______’s work in a number of publications, as well as in the bathroom of the El station at Clark and Foster in Chicago. A work in progress, the piece ______ decided to place there was just to gauge the public’s reaction. For the most part, however, _______ claims to keep a low profile. Future plans of his include publishing a couple of art books and getting involved in the music industry as an editor.
When he isn’t shooting and weaving his digital web of fantasy maidens and fashionable temptresses, ______ enjoys escaping the city and spending ample amounts of time outdoors. One will also find him in the theater enjoying the latest science fiction movie, which comes as no surprise when viewing a number of his images. In a way, _________ has actually created his own artistic reality using scientific means, the digital inputs and outputs of ones and zeros, a virtual wonderland of machinated beauty. The wizardry he performs is a magic carpet ride that leaves us breathless and begging not to ever let go. Why would you want to? Every day with ________ is a brand-new visual journey, where the baggage of routine and monotony is left at home, long-forgotten. I’ll be sure to send a postcard.

The MBA Oath

2009-06-14T13:08:00.001-07:00

You might have seen coverage of this recently in the Economist, NY Times, Financial Times, or on NPR, but in case not I thought I’d pass along a link to the MBA Oath . It is a student-led initiative seeking to raise the standard of professionalism for MBAs, in line with other professional degrees such as medicine and law. More specifically, it is: “a voluntary pledge for graduating MBAs to “create value responsibly and ethically.” [The] goal is to begin a widespread movement of MBAs who aim to lead in the interests of the greater good and who have committed to living out the principles articulated in the oath.”

Having read and signed the Oath, I’d encourage anyone at who agrees with its’ tenets to do the same. To read the sign the MBA Oath, please visit: mbaoath.org

Paul Buser
MBA - Harvard Business School - 2009
MPA - Harvard Kennedy School - 2009
pbuser@mba2009.hbs.edu

For the Shogrens: Dorothea, rest in peace

2009-05-15T19:59:00.001-07:00

In this lustrous opulence I find a sapphire sanctuary
of sweet surreptitious wonder unlike any other that
has befallen before me. Finally I can rest my head in
solace. That minute locks itself in time to keep a
careful watch over my nightly restless rumblings,
envelops me in its nocturnal anonymity, and strokes
its gentle hand upon my furrowed, worried brow
reassuringly until my breathing slows and the
tormented waves cease....could this be possible? No
longer do I sleep to dream. For I have awoken and am
still dancing upon spindles of moonlight and catching
stars like fireflies. Waving, smiling, falling away
into a feather bed of peace.....I finally rest.

From Beans to Brands (unabridged)

2009-05-15T18:10:00.000-07:00

The version posted on http://www.embatalk.com was geared towards EMBA prospects and the EMBA community. My unabridged version was too long to post on that site. Here is the full version I wrote--a draft of course (pardon grammatical errors). Thanks to Linda H for posting and editing the abridged version for EMBAtalk.

Get ready for some flair!

From Beans to Brands: One EMBA alum’s journey from accounting to marketing

My knees slightly bent, my eyes focused intently on the ivory dimpled sphere at my feet, I swing my 3 wood a tad too feverishly. The water hazard punishes my shot by taking my ball into its depths. A perturbed frown quickly graces my face, and I rock back on my heels. What’s a girl to do…well, other than fling my club to the ground in a frustrated fit? But of course: I call a mulligan.
If only the game of life would allow us these bouts of forgiveness golf so generously offers. Perhaps we’d go back to that time in grade school where we taunted the scrawny kid needlessly: mulligan. Or that time we left our mother behind on the doorstep crying: mulligan. Or the way we broke up so abruptly with our college sweetheart: mulligan.
The mulligan I sought involved my career.
You see, I always had a natural bent toward marketing and sales. When I was a little girl I organized these garage sales that brought in a significantly greater amount of money than surrounding homes’ garage sales. When I worked in retail and banquet facility sales during high school and college, respectively, I constantly exceeded my sales goals by more than 100%. I’d assemble marketing plans and promotional campaigns for fun, and then thought nothing of it when the numbers rolled in and rewarded me time and time again. It seemed, well, too easy. Thus, I turned my back on both marketing and sales in favor of the side of business that appeared to be most challenging: accounting. If my class of 60 accounting prospects my freshman year of college dwindled down to 12 by the middle of my sophomore year, then I thought I was well on my way towards accomplishing a significant feat. Math had always come rather easily to me, and accounting was simply like a Rubik’s cube of numbers in my mind that just required some routine order. When my balance sheet would balance, a rush of excitement would course through my veins. A new FASB pronouncement garnered as much excitement as the release date of the Wii. I actually looked forward to compiling an indirect cash flow statement. It’s okay to laugh—I admit I’m a bit quirky. Any of my classmates or family members will be quick to concur. I swear I laugh at my own nuances constantly….but I digress….
For eleven years I measured my successes in accounting terms. At first it was the number of required adjusting journal entries at each year’s end. In my mind, the fewer that were needed, the better job I had done that year. Later on I started measuring my successes in more strategic terms: YOY growth of margins and increases in ROS and ROI resulting from cost cutting measures and capital structure reorganization I spearheaded or implemented. Throughout those first eleven years I seemed to conveniently forget clients mentioning how personable, engaging, and persuasive I was. When I faced a particularly complex series of financial transactions, I forgot my problem solving preparation and escape usually involved penning an essay chock full of alliteration and metaphor. When it came time to presenting ideas and ways of promoting our accounting communications, I forgot how often my way was chosen in relation to others’. When I would meet a complete stranger in the street and enthusiastically strike up some random conversation, which I so love to do, I would dismiss the look of surprise I’d receive when revealing my occupation as that of an accountant. Not once did I think it odd that my roster of close friends included designers, musicians, sales managers, creative strategists, and writers, but excluded accountants. Not once did I think it odd to have this uncanny ability to seamlessly move through and relate to mutually exclusive social circles; during the morning I could be conducting a meeting in a circle of MBA CxOs and VPs, but by evening I’d be having coffee with my eccentric writer friends who not once have ever treated, nor labeled me as business. Not once did I question why I escaped to creative writing after a difficult day, why I procrastinated with completing financials in favor of creating a marketing campaign for a local not-for-profit, or why I was so excitedly advising a colleague about SEO instead of SOX. Over those eleven years I was so focused on the symmetry of the concrete financial blocks I had stacked in such orderly fashion; I had neglected to notice my marketing proclivity had been seeping through the seams all along. I was attempting to chip my ball onto that elusive green with the wrong club; I just didn’t know it yet.
It all came to light in 2007 during the middle of Dr. Balasubramanian’s Global Marketing Management course. I couldn’t remember feeling so inspired in years. In fact, I found myself more passionate about the material we covered and team projects we completed than anything I had experienced in my financial career. Dr. B’s class forced me to confront my denial of my waning passion for accounting, eye-to-eye and toe-to-toe. His class also reopened those doors I had locked on myself so long ago. You see, when I had started the OneMBA program in September 2006, my sights had been set on becoming what Hugh O’Neill calls a “climber”. By the time we had completed Dr. B’s class and returned from our Latin American residency, I had woken up to the realization that my destiny was to become a “shifter”. It was now my task to shift my career from an accounting to a marketing track. Little did I realize how difficult that would be! Not only would I now have to switch my clubs and stance, I would also have to redesign the entire course.
It all began with my job search. I quickly found that while employers were eager to hire me, they wanted me based on my financial expertise rather than my marketing ability. My resume screamed finance any way I sliced it; thus, my brand remained finance. As such, my interviews continued to end with an offer for a financial or accounting position. Heck, I couldn’t even secure an interview with most of the ad agencies or marketing firms. I didn’t have the experience to do what I loved, and yet, I kept getting offers for the types of positions I just didn’t want to do anymore. Talk about a vicious circle. I decided it was high time to completely rebrand myself. If it walks like a duck and talks like a duck, right?
I set out to meet the people I aspired to be in 5-10 years’ time. The first thing I did was join the Triangle Chapter of the American Marketing Association (http://www.triangleama.org) and soon afterwards was elected to the Board as the Chapter’s Treasurer. Little did I realize how natural a fit I was with this group; through the monthly educational lunches and evening socials we put on, I’ve met dozens of the top marketing movers and shakers within the community. A few rapidly became friends. My goal in the upcoming year is to help out with our Social Media and Newsletter outlets to quench my undying thirst for social networking and their accompanying analytics. Plus, it gets me a little further away from the strictly accounting image.
Ten Thousand Villages of Raleigh (http://www.villagesofraleigh.org) was another Board I joined in July of last year. The rest of the Board quickly embraced me as a Finance Committee member, but I quickly shifted gears to spearhead social media initiatives and webpage development to raise awareness of the store and fair trade in general. Now I try to balance my duties between finance and marketing to keep well-versed in both areas for not-for-profits.
In addition to those two boards, I am also a member of the Loras College National Alumni Board (my undergraduate institution), the OneMBA International Alumni Board (one of the two UNC representatives), and I have just been appointed to the Orange County Arts Commission Board. At each organization to which I belong I take great care to avoid accounting altogether as much as possible and work in a marketing facet instead. And in case you were wondering, no, I don't sleep. My love for life, learning, and giving keeps me constantly intrigued and full of whimsy.
Senior leadership at my current workplace took notice of my rather sudden shift in interest. My knowledge of my company’s brand generated a highly coveted spot on the company’s Brand Advocate team, working closely with Global Brand Management and Corporate Identity—not exactly an accountant’s usual cup of tea. And if that wasn’t enough, I constantly reminded my supervisors of my career aspirations and would not let them dismiss my words as folly. I’d be lying if I told you I wasn’t being persistent. I was a squeaky wheel who refused the WD40. But you know something? It worked. In December, a newly created position surfaced in commercial support and merchandising. My former supervisor and current supervisor plucked me out of accounting and put me in merchandising and pricing as a Commercial Consultant. I have honestly never been happier. So a little bit of luck, the right timing, a persuasive case, an open-minded forward-looking boss, and did I mention a little bit of luck?, coupled with (I’d like to believe) the connotative aspects of being surrounded by people and activities who have nothing to do with accounting and everything to do with marketing, helped me make that shift from accounting to marketing. I'm excited to say there are a handful of marketing leaders in the area who can now attest to not only my board work in finance, but in marketing as well. I am finally surrounded by the people I want to be. Ah, the joys and necessity of some seriously time-intensive networking!
I should also mention that I still enjoy accounting: true accounting. I just don't want to do that and only that for the rest of my life. I'm happy to complete some tax returns, compile and analyze financials, study trends, and calculate ratios. But at the same time let me engage in iso-profit scenarios, web strategy, social media analytics, and persuasively minded people-facing activity.

On the other hand, I am not so bold to say that just because I own a pair of FootJoys and golf with Srixon balls I’m a good golfer. Believe me, I’m not. Remember my affinity for water hazards? I also have a mean slice Srixon can’t seem to cure. And for that, I’m just going to have to keep getting saved by calling “mulligan.”
Please feel free to introduce yourself and add me on Facebook (Audra Marotta), Twitter (audragmarotta), and LinkedIn (http://www.linkedin.com/in/agm1127). I’d love to hear from you!

Returning to my roots....literally

2009-05-15T17:17:00.000-07:00

I'm going back to blonde. Currently I'm in stage 1. In June I'll complete stage 2, which will bring me back to within one shade of my natural shade of medium blonde. I can say now that my curiosity with dark hair has been satisfied. Won't be coming back to that. Ever.

Triangle AMA News Blog: Triangle AMA Board Members Attend Leadership Summit#links

2009-05-15T17:14:00.000-07:00

Triangle AMA News Blog: Triangle AMA Board Members Attend Leadership Summit#links

Here I am with Karen A, Susan A, Marlena F, and Shane J. Click on the link to read about our adventures at the American Marketing Association Leadership Summit in Chicago (well, Rosemont technically.....)

My current reading list

2009-04-05T18:08:00.000-07:00

The Paradox of Choice by Barry Schwartz
The End of Poverty by Jeffrey Sachs
The Harvard Business Review Collective on Pricing

On deck:
Social Media Marketing by Dave Evans
Search Engine Marketing by Andreas Ramos

Has anyone read Lynda Resnick's Rubies in the Orchard? I'm getting mixed reviews. I'd like to spend some more time on marketing research if this isn't worth a read.

Dear readers, it has been far too long!

2009-04-05T17:58:00.000-07:00

Work has buried me this past month, so I've had very little time to blog. There are a lot of changes afoot, and for the most part they've been positive. I'm excited our pricing team is so cohesive. We work off each other very well. Our "suit up" day has been forever immortalized and framed in our teamspace table. But alas, someone has stolen my Megablocks skid steer loader, complete with cone and my Einstein quote cap. Who would do such a thing? You see, most people decorate their spaces with models of our products. I found the toy versions that you build up like Legos and have found creativity is spawned best when one plays. (IDEO got that right) But now, I have one less toy to play with, much less other people who play with my toys when they come visit my space.

I have quelled my sorrows with some Jeffrey Sachs readings.

Oh, and I have been told I'm a much better fit for marketing than accounting because I exude a "marketing flair". What exactly does that mean?

Bistro 64 AMA social

2009-02-22T07:50:00.001-08:00

Last week I was at the Triangle AMA social at Bistro 64, and Brian M snapped a shot of me looking tired and without makeup (the horror!). Since many of you haven't seen me with darker hair (I dyed my hair a warm chocolate back in October), I thought I'd post his pic here. I could use some beauty sleep, but at least I'm smiling!

P.S. Don't worry, I'll be going back to my blonde self once the weather warms up. I had never had dark hair before and wanted to see what all the fuss was about.

New sponsor on SocialVibe: EA Mobile

2009-02-08T08:07:00.001-08:00

Thinking young...

2009-02-07T18:28:00.001-08:00

...just comes naturally to me. The day I become a corporation, just let me die. Seriously. Just because I'm 32 doesn't mean I have to be a square. Oscar Wilde said it best: "Life is too important to take seriously."

Cartwheel once a week. Go to a toy store. Be a monster at a haunted house. Do silly, creative things you haven't done since you were a kid. Rediscover the arts. Too many people my age (and younger!! egads!!) have forgotten how to imagine, create, and play. It's sad to see that die.

The men in my life: Jason

2009-01-17T17:06:00.001-08:00

It's no secret how much I love Metallica. Well, LOVED Metallica would be the technically correct tense. This new Metallica is crap. All I want is for a return to Kill Em All, Master of Puppets, And Justice for All, and even the Black album. In my opinion, everything after the Black album has been tepid at best...and now, ugh.....don't get me started. Death Magnetic? Really? REALLY?! I admit it's hard to top a stellar 20-minute jam session of "One" or a crazy pyrotechnics display accompanying "Harvester of Sorrow", but I fail to be even remotely inspired by anything I've heard of their newest album.

Coincidentally, Metallica is the band I've seen most often live. I've moshed and crowd surfed many a time from 1993 through 1999 with these guys in various locations throughout the Midwest. One summer's show involved $4.00 20oz H20 bottles (insanely priced when the temps are above 90F and you aren't allowed to bring anything from the outside in) and jamming to the Screaming Trees and Soundgarden (and pushing my way up to the stage just in time to catch Chris Cornell's sweat on my arm--whee!) before losing my bikini top while crowd surfing to one of Metallica's opening songs. Another show involved one of my friends getting himself accidentally arrested while we were all tailgating before the show. My deft driving and sharp negotiating skills helped ensure our return back to the show just in time as they took the stage. But my favorite concert of all had to be their show at the Bradley Center in Milwaukee on February 14, 1997.

I was finishing up my junior year at college in Dubuque, IA and was thrilled about planning my Valentine's Day weekend/joint 4-year anniversary with Eric M, my high school/college sweetheart. He was attending college three hours away in Waukesha, WI, and Valentine's Day (for the first time ever since we had been dating) was falling on a Saturday! Now being three hours apart from each other made meetings tough. Coupled with us both playing soccer for our respective schools made it that much more challenging. During soccer season we'd see each other once every 6-8 weeks just for the weekend. During off-season we were still both playing indoor, but it wasn't nearly as rough--every 3-6 weeks. Sometimes I'd make that drive on 151/94, and other times he did. So when I discovered we were both free Valentine's Day weekend, AND it fell on a Saturday, I started planning away like a busy bee, booking the most romantic restaurant in Dubuque (at the time it was above Molly Malone's off Bluff St). I found a gorgeous bed and breakfast, and I was pounding the pavement trying to find the perfect gift for his surprise. It was two months of anticipation and excitement. I was so excited he was coming to see me. Then a week before Valentine's Day, he calls me.

He's gotten 9th row seats to the Metallica show in Milwaukee with a couple of other buds on February 14th. Can we postpone our romantic weekend by a couple weeks? And it wasn't so much a question or request, but rather a statement....and FYI. I was being dumped on cupid's day for Metallica? I mean, yeah, they're 9th row seats, but c'mon! They'd tour again! And we could always see them in Chicago or the Quad Cities or Minneapolis.....but I kept myself pulled together and said nothing. I was fuming. I was gutted. I had spent all this time planning like a good lil' lady, and I was being dumped for a night of drinking beer while jamming to rock stars (awesome as they were). Best part was HE DIDN'T INVITE ME. I guess one of his friends asked him to go, and there were 3-4 dudes going together. Shit! Happy VD to me, eh?

Eric lived on the downstairs floor of a house with three other guys. The upstairs was occupied by four girls. One of these girls was Amy, this nerdy funny blonde from Elgin IL who, I believe, was studying engineering. She and Eric had become pretty good friends, and I met her through him. I called her and told her the entire story of my Valentine's Day disaster and being dumped. Turns out, she wanted to go to that show too, but the guys didn't ask her either. Perhaps we should go together? A plan began to hatch.

Amy agreed to go to her ticket broker and find us seats for under $50. I wouldn't tell Eric I was coming; instead I'd spend the day doing girly things with Amy hanging out at her place upstairs and knocking back a few before heading out to the show together. My plan was to find Eric after the show and hit the bars as one large group together. He was not to know I was coming anytime before that. Amy and I started to plot the logistics. Her broker called back: we had secured ourselves general admission for $45 each. YES! Game on!

I left Dubuque early Saturday morning and drove to downtown Waukesha to leave my Eagle Talon in a place where it wouldn't be easily spotted (it was bright blue with Grateful Dead bears and a big NIN across the back; dead giveaway for anyone who knew me). Amy picked me up in her white Dodge pickup, and we went beer shopping. On the way back to the house I covered myself up in blankets and hid in the bed in case any of the guys were home. Though the entrances to the downstairs and upstairs were separate, there was a common driveway both used. I couldn't risk being spotted. Fortunately, none of the guys was home. We parked the truck, and I snuck upstairs. I spent the day chatting, drinking, napping, and chilling. I heard the guys come back downstairs while I was napping on the couch, and I caught myself smiling about my secret. This was going to be such a cool Valentine's Day dammit.

Amy and I headed out to the Bradley Center early with a 12-pack of Icehouse in the bed. We parked the car in the garage adjoining the venue and proceeded to drink. We finished the whole

case. It took us some time, but we drank it all. We missed Corrosion of Conformity, but didn't care. We strolled in buzzed just as Metallica was setting up. I scanned the place for Eric and the guys. No sign of them anywhere. The lights were cut. Metallica hit the stage. As they opened with "So What!", Amy and I began to scream and cheer. We were drunk and loving life in this moment.

As Metallica progressed through the songs, Amy and I started to push our way forward through the crowd. By the time they were singing "King Nothing" we were right up against the barrier, shoving and cheering, front row and center. I could feel Kirk Hammett's sweat drop on us. The people around us were yelling, pushing, shoving.....my eyes locked with Jason Newsted's just for a moment, and I was instantly mesmerized. I have always had a thing for bass guitar players, and this was going to be no exception. The opening riffs to "One" filled the air, and I was in heaven.

During "Nothing Else Matters" I started noticing this roadie running around in the buffer between the stage and the barrier that held the crowd back from running the stage. He was a little older than me, cute as hell, and wearing a flannel shirt (typical Wisconsin garb). I waved him over to get his attention. At first he ignored me, but then he finally approached me when he realized I would jump on top of the barrier if he didn't. I wrapped my sweaty arms around his neck and noticed a backstage pass was adhered to his t-shirt underneath the flannel. OMG! A possible ticket to see Jason up close! I turned my face to his. Our noses couldn't have been more than an inch apart. I gazed deeply into those handsome eyes and went on and on about how I loved Metallica, how they have been my favorite band for ages, and how it would be such an honor for my "sister" and me to be able to go backstage. Could he help us get backstage? And with that, I planted a big drunken kiss on his cheek and smiled sweetly. The roadie stepped back a bit, smiling. "I'll see what I can do." And with that, he was gone. And he didn't return. Song after song passed. Hell, at least I tried, right? Amy and I continued jamming. We never left that front row.

I remember my eyes filling with tears during "Fade to Black." I had closed my eyes, and I felt I was no longer amidst a crowd of people. I was lost in the guitar, lost in the lyrics, in the music. Time just stood still during that song. To this day, I smile and pause in a private moment whenever "Fade to Black" comes on. This concert was a highlight of the close of my college days. I was drunk and introspective, flirtatious and reflective, riding this path toward my dreams atop a song and possibility of what may be. I was wildly successful in my academic career, and I celebrated in song and prose. This night is one I knew I'd always remember.

I had almost forgotten about the roadie. About an hour after we had parted ways he reappeared, though with nothing in hand. We made a beeline right for me, and I stared into his face quizzically every step of his way. As he stood before Amy and me, he reached into his flannel and pulled out two backstage passes. He handed Amy hers, and he proceeded to peel mine off and place it on my chest, never taking his eyes off mine. I swear I had permagrin; I couldn't stop smiling. Man, his gaze was fierce. He was returning my smile, and I felt the flutter of butterflies. I wrapped my arms around him again, having jumped halfway onto the barrier (my hips were holding me on top of it) and kissed him on the cheek again. "Thank you." I said. "You're welcome", he replied, and with that, he was gone. I never saw him again.

Amy and I freaked. We were going backstage! We were going to meet Metallica! The concert ended, the lights came up, and Amy and I walked around the arena, trying to find Eric and the other guys. No luck. After about 20 minutes we gave up and went to meet the band. I remember waiting in line with a crowd of about 20 other people. Amy and I were chatting, still buzzed from the Icehouse. I was the furthest thing from being tired, though! I was so excited! And then, Jason came out. I didn't really care about the other band members so much. Here was Jason effin' NEWSTED in front of me! Aaaaa! I got all tongue-tied and lamely asked him to sign my Footos shirt. "Foo Fighters, eh?" he asked. "I dig em." I just nodded, silent, like Ralphie did in Santa's lap in A Christmas Story. He scribbled on my shirt, and I walked away from him. What the hell was that, I thought. How lame am I?! This is Jason Newsted, woman. MAN UP TO THE BAR ALREADY. I waited a little bit as others talked to him and then I marched right back up to him, pulled up my shirt, and asked him to sign my *censored for PG audience* LOL. He was smiling and obliged. I then wrapped my left arm around his shoulders while practically sitting on his lap (he didn't seem to mind!), and someone took our picture (the guy who took it never sent me that picture--grrr!). Anyway, Jason was wearing a black sweatshirt with a hoodie on it. I could feel the heat from his sweat though the fabric, but he smelled good. Not like aftershave or cologne, but he didn't stink. I can't exactly describe it. He just smelled.....goooooood. Like a sexy dude would. :D

Amy and I went out to eat afterwards, then it was back to the house. Eric was already in bed sleeping when I knocked on their door to let me in. He was surprised as all hell I was there. When I told him of our adventure, he seemed a little shocked and (I strongly believe) upset. It was dark, so it was hard to gauge his reaction, but he wasn't too thrilled about Jason's John Hancock. I didn't care. Here he had dumped me on Valentine's Day for 9th row Metallica seats, while I got all the way to 1st row, backstage, and had a silly little conversation with Jason Newsted. Jealous a little? Perhaps.

As I lay in bed that night next to him, I thought to myself: moral of the story--don't dump me on Valentine's Day! With that, I fell asleep smiling.

Years later I realized how much Jason Newsted looks like Dale Earnhardt Jr., and the attraction ceased almost immediately. In fact, I haven't found Jason attractive since about 2000. But for that night....that one night....he was my dreamboat.

Help support charity: water by clicking on my link here.

2009-01-17T07:54:00.000-08:00

I'm pretty active on SocialVibe and feel charity: water is a great cause. http://www.socialvibe.com/charitywater?r=484305&rs=spread_8

Jason Newsted is next...I swear!

The men in my life

2009-01-11T22:41:00.000-08:00

Next up will be Jason Newsted. Yes, Jason Curtis Newsted of Metallica. Don't judge! I know you're laughing.

There's a great story behind this crush. A Valentine's Day story. It's a juicy one, and it involves Jason's scribble, being dumped, my jumblies, revenge, and jumping a barricade to embrace a roadie. Twice.

Stay tuned.

Ten Thousand Villages of Raleigh

2009-01-11T22:39:00.001-08:00

I started a blog for them (as well as a Facebook page, Twitter, and LinkedIn group). Get yourself educated. Take a peek: http://villagesofraleigh.blogspot.com

Can anyone please send me about 6 more hours per day?

2009-01-08T20:05:00.000-08:00

I could really use 30 instead of 24. This girl has to sleep SOMETIME. Jimminy crickets, it's been a crazy week.

MAC is helping me raise money for charity: water! Join me! Learn about my cause.

2009-01-08T19:59:00.000-08:00

Audra invites you to SocialVibe.com

The men in my life: Matthew

2009-01-07T18:24:00.001-08:00

Ok, seriously, how can I NOT go gaga over this actor? 1. He's an Austinite and die-hard Longhorns fan. 2. He prefers his Airstream trailer over a fancy hotel room 3. Three words: Just Keep Livin' 4. He was arrested for smoking pot while dancing around in the buff and beating on bongos 5. Pabst 6. Just look at him!!!

It was the summer of 1996 when I went to the Colonial Village theater in Rockford, IL to watch A Time to Kill. I walked into the theater excited that my favorite John Grisham novel was made into a movie. I left the theater starry eyed over its lead actor. In fact, he's the only actor I've found attractive in the past 13 years. I'm still a sucker for those Texan peepers!

I fell in love with Austin, TX back in 1998 when I flew down to visit my friend Aaron S. I spent a week at his place with my other close Wisconsin pal Andy R, and the three of us tore up the town. Andy and I flew from Mitchell to Dallas, and Aaron picked us up from the airport in a Mustang convertible. We drove the three hours back to Austin, Andy and I knocking back a few beers along the way. We drove straight to 6th Street. I mean, our luggage was still in Aaron's trunk. We went straight from the airport to the Library and proceeded to engage in a mean game of Golden Tee. That entire week was such a blast. We hiked around the Barton Creek Greenbelt, ate at the Salt Lick, climbed Mount Bonnell, rabble-roused at the Tavern on 12th and Lamar, spent another whole night on Cedar Street, and then attended this crazy house party/crawdaddy boil where I was thrown into Lake Travis and came back to Aaron's place wearing some rasta guy's tee shirt because mine was covered in sludge. Aaron was dating this girl Jennifer, and she and I bonded pretty quickly after going to the local grocery store to pick up some live crawdaddies.

I came back to Austin many times after that. Sometimes I'd see Aaron, and sometimes I wouldn't. I started striking up some new friendships, including an equine vet I hoped to start dating. I visited McCombs at UT with every intention of moving there in October 2001 and starting my MBA program full-time in the fall of 2002. In May of 2001 I even picked out my apartment off Spyglass Drive (Misson Barton Creek) and put a deposit down. I loved everything about Austin, especially SXSW, Stubbs, the Red River District, and Zilker Park. I was so ready to leave the Midwest!!

Then on June 20, 2001 I went out on a blind date that changed my life forever. I didn't know it at the time, but this blind date was going to become my husband 4.5 years later. During the first three months of our dating I postponed my Austin move because everything about Mike M felt right. I mean, everything. He didn't know it yet, but I did.

Life is crazy sometimes.

Anyway, Matthew McConaughey, I must let you know my husband has offered me a free night with you should you ever knock on my door, but I had to promise my husband the same should Elisabeth Shue come knocking instead.

Congratulations on being my only non-musician crush in the past decade and a half!

Best wishes with Camila and Levi. Just Keep Livin'!

The men in my life: Trent

2008-12-30T13:50:00.000-08:00

Those of you who don't know me all that well may be surprised by this crush. Those of you in my close circles know I have babbled on about this dark performer like an enamored, starstruck schoolgirl over the past 16 years. Yes, I have had a crush on Trent for literally half my lifetime! I used to crush harder on him back in 1992-1999, while the past 9 years it's been more like a smoldering ember, but the attraction is still there. It's his passion, his songwriting, his performances, his innovative plays with technology, his intelligence and rebellion.....the dark, brooding type whose music is his catharsis. Being a sci fi and horror movie junkie, as well as a die hard fan of artists on the Wax Trax! label, his videos captivated me. His interviews were thought provoking. His voice sexy. I could feel this emotion bubbling right below the surface, and his eyes......those eyes.....one look, and I am a puddle. That is why he gets three images in my entry.

I don't exactly remember where I first heard NIN. At the time I was into Urge Overkill's Supersonic Storybook, Neds Atomic Dustbin's God Fodder, and Erasure's Chorus and Abba-esque (which I bought at Appletree Records by the Northern Illinois University campus). It was right when I had started dating Eric M, and I want to say one of the guys in the BHS weight room was playing Pretty Hate Machine on a tape deck while we were lifting at 6am for track. I do remember "Ringfinger" stuck with me from day 1, and to this day it's one of my top 5 NIN tracks. My little brother tells me my entire junior and senior years of high school I would not shut up about Trent.

I picked up the inaugural CMJ New Music Monthly and proceeded to collect every single issue for the next 5 years. I shopped at Goodwill for my thermals. I'd listen to "Burn" while out on my 4- or 5-mile runs. I started my first job with Arby's in November of 1992. While working there over the summer of 1993 there was this older biker-looking guy with a gray beard who would always come through the drive-thru on my shift, try to flirt with me, and order nothing but a large Pepsi. He was always by himself and drove a beat-up Delta 88 circa 1980-1982. After weeks of this strange behavior, I was closing one night, and he came through twice. The second time he told me he wanted to talk to me. He told me I was beautiful, and that he would like to spend some time with me. I told him I was dating someone. He said it didn't matter, and that he would wait for me until after I closed the store. I protested, but with this crazy look in his eye, he just drove off with his Pepsi and parked right next to my car, cut his engine, and sat there. I freaked. I told the manager about him, and she went out there and asked him to leave. He didn't. I then called my boyfriend-of-six-months Eric and told him how scared I was. Should I call the police? He told me just to sit tight and not leave the restaurant. Twenty minutes later Eric walked into the restaurant in a heavy flannel jacket, lead pipe in hand. He noticed my eyes grew as large as saucers when they connected with his weapon, and reassured me, "Don't worry. I didn't use it." He told me he had had a nice chat with the guy, and that I shouldn't worry about him anymore. I peeked out the window over his shoulder and noted the stalker's car was now gone. I don't know what Eric said to him that night, but I never saw that guy again. Ever.

During my senior year of high school I started working at Spencer Gifts and bought every NIN shirt we got in. I put four holes in my right ear, including the cartilage. I wore bohemian floral dresses with combat boots. At one point I even dyed my hair purple. I didn't want people to label me anymore. I was going to be the valedictorian of my class, but I was too athletic to be called a geek and too academic to be called a jock. I wasn't exactly metal, nor hippie, nor grunge. Some days I'd dress preppy too, just for good measure. I was promoted to assistant manager at Spencers and started doing some of my own visual merchandising. The Downward Spiral came out, and I was instantly floored. I graduated high school and entered the county fair queen pageant just to keep my best friend Nanci T company...as a last hurrah together before she was to go off to college in Minnesota, while I'd run off to Iowa.

Yes, there was an evening gown competition, interview, and swimsuit competition.

No, my hair wasn't purple at the time. LOL

My nickname was "Hoser" (from Strange Brew).

Natural Born Killers was my new favorite movie.

I started college heavily involved in intramurals. Mike H and Eric R were my co-ed basketball teammates, and I won the intramural free throw competition that fall (23/25). I was also on a co-ed volleyball team in Waterloo, where I got to know Ryan H. He gave me my first motorcycle ride on the back of his after a game one weekend, and we started spending a lot of time riding together. I had three Trent posters on my walls, including a black and white headshot on the wall at the foot of my bed facing me that showed up eerily well when I would keep my blacklight on through the night. Karen C and I deejayed our own one-hour weekly radio show called "Twilight Zone", where we would muse over the Cramps' Flamejob album cover and Hhead's existence, play students' voicemail greetings on the air, and spin the best and most obscure 80s new wave music we could find. I was also a television reporter for our college station and learned how much work was involved editing video segments (holy hellbaskets, people, I salute those of you in video editing!) . My love of NIN was shared by many of the boys of fifth floor Keane, but there was one boy in particular I grew pretty close to: Mike S. I would spend many nights in his and Cliff's room sipping on lemonade vodka concoctions while listening to Velvet Underground and discussing life. There was a group of us who drove to Gary, Indiana one weekend together to get fake IDs, and I fell asleep on Mike's shoulder when we spent the night in Lincoln Park. One night during the late fall he came over to my dorm room, wanting to talk. He was upset about a relationship of his and needed to vent. I needed a release as well and shared my frustrations over my Eric/Pete mess. We talked for what seemed like forever, then fell asleep on my bed, fully clothed, just holding each other, bonded by our friendship and shared emotions. He smelled like sugar cookies. Every time I hear "A Warm Place", I think about that night.

The men in my life: Dave

2008-12-29T19:24:00.001-08:00

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RxPHafP79B4

1990 was a year of astounding changes for me. During the summer between my 8th and 9th grade years I lost about 20 pounds, ditched my glasses for contacts (my ban for the F-bomb was over!), and grew out my hair to get a perm. I entered high school looking like a completely different person. I joined the cross country team (this was a fall sport; I played basketball in the winter and ran track in the spring) and made the varsity squad within two races. Boys started noticing me. While working out over the summer, I first heard Depeche Mode's "Enjoy the Silence" come on the radio, and about 30 seconds into the song I froze in my tracks, captivated by the melody, the voice, the lyrics.....this song was officially the stepping stone of my transition from metal to alt/synth/electro (with the exception of Metallica, but I'll come back to that in another post regarding another crush). Within months I was pumping Violator on my cassette deck over and over, alternating with Cure's Disintegration for good measure due to my newfound fascination of the darker electronica. I had no draw to Robert Smith, however. My heartstrings were instantly pulled by Dave Gahan's velvet vocals. All it took was one look at him brooding at me from a poster at Musicland, and I was smitten. Quite honestly, all my crushes (save for Matthew, a topic of a future post) from Dave onwards were musicians. While many escape to drugs, alcohol, movies, hobbies.....my escape was music. I lost myself in music. Thus it seemed only natural I would forever be bent towards musicians. This has been true for the past 20 years....

My first high school boyfriend was a senior named Andrew K. He was a drummer, and he instantly stole my heart. We would steal kisses behind the high school double doors outside of the band room, and Depeche Mode's "World in My Eyes" would constantly play in my head when we did. I trained, studied, and opened myself to the world of Erasure and Pet Shop Boys, but Dave always came back to me. The summer between my senior year of high school and freshman year of college I met Peter C while working at the Belford Drive-In. He would make me these mix tapes of music I adored and cherished and played over and over for the following few years. He introduced me to James (the band). We watched What's Eating Gilbert Grape one evening in his basement, and "I Feel You" is the only song that keeps coming back into my head from that night (no, we didn't sleep together; I had just lost my flower to Eric M four months prior, and he was the only one I shared flowers with until the end of 1998--yes, I know that sounds weird for that time span of 17-22--but I protected my flower!!!). Pete's intensity, writing, and philosophical viewpoints attracted and scared me simultaneously. We had a complicated connection, since I was dating Eric M. Pete and I had to remain friends, and that was that. That was hard for me, since it was the first time in my life I was caught between a boy I loved (Eric) and a boy I felt truly connected to (Pete). I loved Eric madly, but he was into metal, hair bands, and sported a buzzcut, while Pete was into electro, synthpop, ambiguity, and had this floppy new wave cut, glasses, and eyes that would melt a polar icecap (plus his dad was a math professor, and I am a math geek!). Today Eric and I no longer speak, though I wish him well. Pete and I remain good friends. I guess that speaks volumes, yes?

Dave Gahan was a staple on my dorm room walls throughout my college years, and he made me cry during the Singles Tour when he sang "Only When I Lose Myself" so beautifully. I had broken up with Eric six months prior (January 1998) and was trying to adjust to being single after having been in a relationship for five years. I wasn't quite ready to date again, so I folded myself back into the music I loved the most. And that music was Depeche Mode's. Dave made me cry. He helped me release the loneliness, the heartache, and he soothed me back to sleep. I can't wait for their new album to come out in 2009. You can bet your bottom dollar I'll be getting tickets for their next tour! And watch the video I provided a link to below his picture. I'm telling you that voice gets me EVERY TIME.

The men in my life: Patrick

2008-12-28T15:41:00.000-08:00

It was 1988 when I fell for this handsome stallion of Dirty Dancing and Point Break. In fact, I watched my Dirty Dancing VHS until it no longer played. I wrote Patrick Swayze a letter, which my mother saved in its original sealed envelope....to this day I don't know what I wrote to him. I collected his photos in all my teeny bopper magazines and read every article I could find about him. 1988-1989 were my middle school years, the years I started to rebel. I had been accepting the teasing for far too long, and I was tired of being labeled a nerd. I started running for the track team--surprisingly, I was a pretty good sprinter. When I ran the 200 yard dash for the first time, I was so far ahead of the other kids I stopped running before I crossed the finish line by accident. I thought I had finished the race where the coach was standing! One other girl passed me before I realized I wasn't done. I came in second, but I'll never forget that race. My track career just took off from there.

I started listening to Metallica, Def Leppard (only Pyromania), Poison (only Look What the Cat Dragged In), Soundgarden, and Guns N Roses, while rejecting every mainstream pop band, especially the New Kids on the Block. I had a jean jacket with about 40 pins, shared my first kiss with Ken H in the halls of the old BJHS building (he played guitar in the junior high band....I believe it was a sign of a trend to come), developed really solid friendships with the L twins (Todd and Erik), and was pushed by my honors reading teacher Mr. Larsen to reach my potential. To this day, Mr. Larsen remains strong in my memory. I flirted with Jason N and wanted desperately to impress him (he was four years older), so I wrote a poem using the word f*** a lot. To my horror, my parents found that poem, and they banned me from getting contact lenses for a year. I made out with Jason T at the YMCA dance and joined the basketball team. I started to lose a lot of weight.

Throughout the ups and downs, Houston-born Patrick Swayze and his love of horses kept me warm at night when I got dumped on a date with Nate W to see Bonfire of the Vanities. I had just started coming out of my shell, and my heart got smacked hard. Throughout the rest of 8th grade it was the sounds of Axl Rose, the thoughts of Patrick, and my love of sports that kept me looking forward. It wouldn't be until 1990 that big changes would really start to take shape.

I wish nothing but the best to Patrick and his family as he continues to fight pancreatic cancer. Patrick, you were there for me when I needed a crush the most. You will always be remembered for that. Well, that and your Point Break body and hair.....HOT!

The men in my life: Gene

2008-12-27T20:41:00.000-08:00

The summer before I turned 12 Dirty Dancing came out on video (both the Beta and VHS versions--lol). I was heavily into the Sweet Valley High series, so my mind was primed for summer puppy love. I watched the movie only once, and O...M...G.....John Stamos was quickly forgotten. Hello, Patrick Swayze!

I have always had a thing for men who can dance (blame it on Baryshnikov and the years I spent in ballet, tap, and modern). Gene Kelly was one of my favorite leading men (not to mention, my all-time longest lasting crush) the instant I watched him woo Debbie Reynolds in Singing in the Rain. My dad is big into musicals, so I saw most all of the most popular ones before I was in junior high. SITR, Music Man, King and I, Fiddler on the Roof.....you get the picture. It wasn't long before I sought out every film Gene starred in (I have most of them all on DVD today and will likely get them all in whatever the new format will be decades from now). And his voice....he just was the TOTAL picture. I longed for old Hollywood glamour and blame some of my styling, both at work and at play, on him and his movies. He also shares my birthday. See? We were meant to be together.......anywho, Gene epitomizes the perfect man for me. He is confident, imperfect, dedicated, stubborn, comfortable in his own skin dancing, singing (or doing whatever it may be), and well put together. Read: HOTNESS. Can you name anyone these days who has even remotely the same amount of talent? Anyway, Gene is sort of my halo of crushes. While I would crush hard on John, Patrick, or later Trent, Gene is that gentle humming of a crush constantly in the back of my mind. I no longer crush on John today, but Gene is still here, front and center.

I'll get back to Mr. Swayze in my next post, since there are a few stories that go along with that crush.

The men in my life, inspired by the Prodigy. First up: John.

2008-12-27T20:06:00.000-08:00

I found out Prodigy's releasing a new album in the spring, followed by a tour of the UK. Hearing this news made me all hot and bothered to peck at the computer to see what other related tidbits I could find about my college crush, Keith Flint. As I caught up with the Prodigy's goings-on over the past 5-7 years, I found myself drifting back to memories of when I started listening to their music for the first time in the early 90s....and I got all wistful. Curse my hard wiring.

I have decided to post my biggest crushes I can remember from my days of youth, as these fellas were the ones I turned to when I needed to heal, to explore, to challenge, and to escape. Each crush of mine brings back all sorts of memories....some were happy, but many of them were not all that pleasant.

The earliest crush I can remember is John Stamos. Yes, Uncle Jesse from Full House. I was 10, and I had this dream that he surprised me with a diamond heart necklace and then whisked me away into a hot tub (it was all innocent....I was TEN for chrissakes). Most of the boys (and many of the girls) at my elementary school used to tease me a lot and leave me out of their circles since I was a straight A student with a boyish haircut and big glasses. I was a geek, and they all let me know it. I spent most of my childhood and the very beginning of my teen years confused and hurt by their cruelty. With the outside world having its way with me emotionally, I clung that much tighter to my family....like a life jacket in a turbulent sea.....and turned inward to my studies to even a greater degree. Most emotional risks I took back then burned me. So I focused on my grades and the people who loved me (my parents, brother, grandparents, aunt and cousins). I also wanted a knight in shining armor to come whisk me away from all the mean kids. Someone handsome, dashing, funny, and imperfect. That man was John Stamos. I clipped out his pictures from my Tiger Beat and Bop magazines and daydreamed about him every time I would get sad. I also watched every episode of Full House without fail. John Stamos was my imaginary boyfriend.

Normally I'd feel silly admitting this, but after 20+ years he still looks pretty fine!

From where I sit

2008-12-04T21:06:00.000-08:00

I sit outside to warm my hands in night's blanket.  With each breath I form
a cloud that nuzzles my nose before bidding me adieu, vanishing into the crisp
blackness. I gaze in awe, befuddled, as another cloud dances 'round my rosy
cheeks and slowly wisps away. I can not calculate its random path, so mesmerized
I watch a part of me circle and twist before my sparkling, watery eyes,
entrancing me, soothing me.

With every breath, a part of my soul escapes my lips and blends so peacefully
with this diamond-encrusted brilliance. Countless drops of life, swelling by
tens to the twenty-third power, to become one with that which lacks a beating
heart, yet is limitless in form, ever-changing, ever-moving, ever-coursing a
piece of it back into me.

Brisk, yet not frozen, senses heightened without fright, more aware I become of
the symbiotic dichotomy that is my ivory and its ebony, joined in full circle,
hand and hand. I can not help but look up and smile at this twinkling wonder and
proceed to peel off my down-filled, crinkly, wool shell to
be

    not a concept, nor a profession, nor a mold of others' bounds.

                  Just to be.


 In love with the omnipresent omniscience that is
 harbored within each of us, but unrealized at best.

                            Just to be.

I must be ill with a fever; this tomfoolery must stop

2008-11-23T15:42:00.001-08:00

When I was in eighth grade, all hip wearing my day-glo hoop earrings, my oversized tie dye Body Glove tee shirt that would change colors with heat, spandex leggings and two pairs of socks (the opposite color block on each foot), I filled my ears with sounds most girls my age didn't. While most females obsessed over which New Kid was the cutest, I openly rejected this idiotic band with a sneer and a snap bracelet. Pumping through my cassette Walkman were the sweet sounds of Guns N Roses Appetite for Destruction, Soundgarden's Screaming Life, and Motley Crue's Girls Girls Girls.

Now two decades later I realize just how lame I've become. I have found myself bopping to the sounds of the below video. What is wrong with me? I'm telling you, I must be ill with some sort of mindnumbing fever that has seized my rational thinking (not to mention my good taste). I believe the only cure for what ails me is a strong dose of Pantera's Power Metal or Metallica's Master of Puppets. Make it end, oh please, make it end.

A day in the life of a marketer wannabe

2008-11-23T15:22:00.000-08:00

I'm so excited I got into Branding this spring! I also got into Marketing Strategy. Though I completed my MBA in global business administration in June, I'm now loading up my transcript with marketing electives over the next few years. Nothing like bursting out onto the biz with both guns blazing. That, and I'm an incurable overachiever plagued by my passion for marketing analytics. Anyhooo, it'll be great to go back to school for a few months in between my other commitments. It will also keep my mind off the downward spiral into the abyss (aka the global economy).

Right now I'm making mezzaluna pasta with a basil pesto filling to keep my mind off the tax return I need to complete tonight.

I have mastered the fine art of procrastination. Oh yes, I have.

Oh, what's a girl to do?

2008-10-21T19:17:00.000-07:00

The husband's in Denver, the dog is finally asleep, and all my Halloween decorations are up.

Being idle is not exactly a strong suit of mine.

I have shot myself in the foot: pointless post #596

2008-10-18T17:46:00.000-07:00

Well, not literally. I'd say it was more like unintentional visage cultivation. You see, over the years I have been told every so often I resemble Linda Evangelista. Mind you, I'm about 3 inches shorter and 2 dress sizes larger, so I'm not even close to supermodel shape. Yes, I realize this is a huge compliment, but I really don't think I look like her. Don't get me wrong: I adore her to pieces. She and Eva were my favorite models of the late 80s-early 90s. But when I look at myself in the mirror I don't see Linda. I see my mom. Well, everything except my nose. But I digress.

So yesterday I visited Jerielle, the only stylist I trust in this state, to give my hair a bit of an update. I was born with hair that didn't match my eyebrows, and over the years I have only brought out the blonde to a greater degree. Now I love my eyebrows. Love, love, love them (thank you, Mom!). But alas, they are naturally hued chestnut. I asked Jerielle to match my hair to my eyebrows. Yes, you read that right. I decided to go where most women choose boldly not to go. I traded in my golden locks for rich chocolate ones. At first glimpse out of the shampoo bowl, my eyes probably grew wide as saucers. Jimminy Crickets it was dark. Not goth vampire dark, but not like anything I've ever had before. It lightened up a bit as it dried, and on the way home I wondered whether I had done the right thing. I'm a natural worrier, though. This morning I woke up in loooooove with the color. I'm so silly sometimes.

I styled it into a polished bob and left the house to run errands. Twice today....yes, TWICE! I got stopped in my tracks to be told I look like Linda. One lady did a double take as I was sitting in the M.A.C. makeup chair at Nordstroms trying on different hues. She felt obligated to march right up and tell me I look exactly like her. Was there something in the air?

I came home to Google Linda to find out the hue I had chosen is one of Linda's signature colors, and my bob today was shaped exactly like hers from some time ago. Observe:

I was totally stoked to find out she's the new face of Prada this fall (at age 43!!). Could there be some handsome angel donor who would be willing to buy me these shoes? I almost fainted from desire when I saw them.
Between Alexander McQueen's current collection: http://www.worldstarhiphop.com/videos/video.php?v=wshha0lPra6hw2MB70T2 (*love!*),

Louis Vuitton's

and Jean Paul Gaultier's

....let's just say I've been quite inspired lately.....

Hello, October!

2008-10-12T13:39:00.000-07:00

So I was picking up Hernando de Soto's "The Mystery of Capital" today as my new read and paused long enough to realize it's already October. I guess I could have paid closer attention to the crayola crimson and blazing tangerine hues of the autumn foliage or the fact that I have actually started wearing a sweater on my commute to work in the mornings....but frankly, I just haven't had the time to breathe and bathe in the lavish beauty that accompanies this changing of the guard.

Back in September I was living, sleeping, and breathing work. Even my dreams had work-related acronyms floating through them. I escaped to Washington DC for a weekend sojourn to speak to the OneMBA 2010 class as a panelist discussing a day in the life of an executive working in the current US economic business environment. I blinked and found myself back in the throes of deadlines and stress-entrenched meetings (particularly outside of work--I sit on four boards). Sleep? What? Who, me?

I also spent a weekend in Indianapolis at the MotoGP race, cheering on my two favorites: Nicky Hayden of the US and Casey Stoner of Australia. Hurricane Ike decided to hit the track the afternoon of the race, and I'll bet the cyclists didn't expect to be running in 45mph winds with sideways-spitting rain on a winding track that would make even a rally car racer from Estonia proud. They called the race at the 20th lap, crowing Valentino Rossi the winner, but in my mind all these racers deserved a round of applause for being able to race at 170mph in these sorts of conditions. That's what I call true talent (or insanity--sometimes, they're the same thing).

Last weekend I flew up to Dubuque, Iowa for a retreat and alumni board meeting for my undergraduate institution. Between cooking brats and handing out 400+ buns in the course of 3 hours at the Homecoming tailgate, I managed to catch up with my finance professor (whose class I took 12 years ago, yet somehow he still remembered me as if I was his pupil yesterday), the president of the college (who interviewed me for the Board of Regents scholarship my senior year of high school and is one I am proud to call a good friend today), and the VP of Institutional Advancement to discuss a Facebook related branding issue. I ran around my old haunts and saw many friends from a decade past, and it was the best fun I've had in many moons.

This past weekend I hopped down to Charlotte for the Bank of America 500 and basically took a four-hour nap while my husband tuned in to his favorite racers on his headphones. I cursed myself for not having brought my new issue of Inc. or Reason to peruse, so I had to make due by just sleeping. It was probably the longest stretch of sleep I have had all week.

I miss the academia side of my life already. I miss the challenges, the world of discovery and new places. My xenophile nature has been begging for a fix of far-flung teamwork. I can't wait for the electives to come out. I have to take a few classes next year just to keep learning, to keep moving, to keep interacting with even more new people.

Come see my OCEAN

2008-09-21T14:37:00.000-07:00

Throughout the academic portion of my career I have taken multiple personality tests, but the OCEAN has been by far my favorite, as well as most accurate.

Openness

This trait refers to the extent to which you prefer novelty versus convention. Approximately 91.9% of respondents have a lower openness raw percentage than yours. You are someone who is far more intellectually curious and sensitive to beauty than most. You might say that your beliefs are individualistic and frequently drift towards the unconventional, and that you enjoy your imagination and the exciting places it takes you!

I'm pretty unconventional in most every aspect I can think of, and I'm inclined to say my husband appreciates that. Conventions are for lemmings. I've always been one who likes to mow her own path in her own way, and I dare you to put me in one of your neat little boxes. Not much of a follower--never was. My imagination is what keeps me excited about constant change and what lies ahead in the unknown future. It also keeps me young and playful.

Conscientiousness

This trait refers to the extent to which you prefer an organized, or a flexible, approach in life. Approximately 96.4% of respondents have a lower conscientiousness raw percentage than yours. You are someone who is a perfectionist. From your responses it appears that you prefer to plan everything to the last detail, which has consequently led to you being very successful and extremely reliable. From your responses it appears that more than most you enjoy seeing your long-term plans come to fruition.

I'll admit it. I'm a die-hard, determined, ambitious perfectionist. But hell, I've achieved everything I've set out to do so far. I call that "persevering" and "patient". But to-may-to, to-mah-to, like it or not, I'm a planner. I enjoy planning and then implementing and seeing things through to the very end.

Extraversion

This trait refers to the extent to which you enjoy company, and seek excitement and stimulation. Approximately 75.8% of respondents have a lower extraversion raw percentage than yours. You are someone who is energetic and active. Your answers describe you as someone who enjoys and actively seeks out social occasions, and that you especially enjoy talking with a big group of people.

Uhhhhh....yep. The only days I'm not cheery and energetic are when I am deathly ill and projectile vomiting. And even then I'm usually bouncing back within a few hours. I'm what Malcolm Gladwell calls a "connector". I love people. I love speaking to them, engaging in challenging discussions, teaching, and persuading.

Agreeableness

This trait refers to the way you express your opinions and manage relationships. Approximately 27.5% of respondents have a lower agreeableness raw percentage than yours. You are someone who people can find difficult to get along with when you first meet, as you can be suspicious of their motives. Your responses suggest that over time though people warm to you, and you to them, although that doesn't stop you telling them "how it is".

Bitch is the new black, y'all. I can't help that, nor really want to. I value honesty over political correctness. Don't like it? Don't play in my garden. But I am empathetic, caring, compassionate, and sympathetic. I just don't wear it on my sleeve.

Neuroticism (Emotional stability)

This trait refers to the way you cope with, and respond to, life's demands. Approximately 30.8% of respondents have a lower neuroticism raw percentage than yours. You are someone who is calm and emotionally stable. Based on your responses, you come across as someone who is rarely bothered by things, and when they do get you down the feeling does not persist for very long.

I run away from drama, and I can't think of the last time I was really bothered by something to the point of being brought down. That almost never happens. I'm too much in love with life and all the options that exist out there. I'm fearless and love far too much. Deal with it.

I talked to the Wall Street Journal on Wednesday!

2008-08-16T17:44:00.000-07:00

And I'm going to keep you in suspense until September!

*attempts her best Dr. Horrible evil cackle sans voice coach*

The past few weeks have been insane at work, but I'm working on a couple projects I'm really excited about. More later.....

Neil Patrick Harris as Dr. Horrible

2008-08-16T17:43:00.000-07:00

From the Bedroom

2008-08-09T17:56:00.000-07:00

We finally moved out of our treehouse guest bedroom and into our master bedroom downstairs! Heck, we've only owned this house just a little over two years. A generous gift from my brother allowed us to buy a king bedframe and some curtains/hardware, so the rest of the project sorta snowballed from there. We ordered a signature series mattress from Sealy, and I went shopping to decorate. Our main colors are a warm chocolate brown and sage green, with accents of black and various other shades of green. I'm currently putting together the art for the walls, focused on securing several matted and framed Gil Elvgren prints.

I've also had a lot of time to cook lately. It's amazing what one can accomplish when one no longer has classes! Thai chili scallops with fusilli in a peppered cream sauce and spicy shrimp and grits with Wisconsin sharp cheddar have been just two of the dishes I've made recently. Cooking is my new creative channel, and I've also picked up my pen again. It's been far too long since I've written for release.

Again, I <3 the Dutch!

2008-08-06T17:38:00.000-07:00

So....if you ask for a paper application for the 2009 Executive MBA program at the Rotterdam School of Management, be prepared to be greeted by yours truly! RSM used a headshot of mine that was taken while I was in class in the Netherlands as the front cover of their new brochure. I'm totally flattered by this honor. Not only is RSM a phenomenal business school, they must also believe I look Dutch! Heck, it's only a two-hour plane ride to Lithuania from there....close enough! :-)

Thank you, Dianne and Chantal!

You can find a copy of the brochure at the bottom right-hand corner here: http://www.rsm.nl/home/mba/emba

I received four copies in the mail today as a thank you. I'm convinced all these signs lately are trying to tell me I should move to Europe.

A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Grocery Store

2008-08-06T17:24:00.000-07:00

You can't make this kind of stuff up--true story! Yesterday I went to the pet store to pick up two cases of dog food cans, a stuffed toy with all sorts of squeakers in it, and some doggy treats. You would think that carrying that sort of load in your arms while walking in heels in 100-degree heat in light wool pants would have been punishment enough. Well, dear readers, this is where the plot starts to thicken. I set everything down in my trunk, then proceeded to walk to the grocery store next door to pick up a few items. While inside, I caught a couple of glances and what seemed like suppressed grins. Instinctively (and discreetly) I checked to make sure my fly was zipped and that I didn't have a hole in my pants. Nothing. I went through the self-checkout, drove back to work, stepped into the elevator, pressed "4", and watched the doors close in front of me. There in the polished steel and mirrors of the inside of the elevator something caught my eye. I was wearing a bright blue shirt, and on the bottom of my left breast a bright pink spot was screaming for attention. A sticker had migrated from the squeaky plush animal I had carried in my arms to its new home on my breast. Yes, it was bright pink, and in large letters read "Squeeze Me." Horrified (yet LMAO), I tore it off before the elevator doors had a chance to open in front of my co-workers on the 4th floor.

Hey, it could have been worse. Somebody could have actually followed directions!

Topsail

2008-07-10T16:57:00.000-07:00

Mike, Ruta, and I had a blast spending the weekend of the 4th camped out on Topsail Island. I got plenty of sun and consumed many beverages of the Magic Hat variety. Somehow I was missing my Pabst.....but hooray for soft shell crabs and scallops!

Anyhooo, things are going well with my new job. Looks like I'll be taking my Green Belt test in September at work, and I just booked my Dubuque, Iowa weekend for October's Homecoming (and what should be my 10-year college reunion, but I graduated half a year early). The National Alumni Board meetings will keep me busy for much of the time, but I look forward to catching up with friends. Then in late October Mike takes off for Denver for a Project Management seminar.

I've been missing China lately. The days I spent in Shanghai were unforgettable. I'm also missing my classmates. Hopefully we can work out our class reunion in Dubai next year.

Book Buzz

2008-07-01T19:56:00.000-07:00

It turns out Jeffery Deaver's "The Broken Window" has been featured as "the" mystery book of the summer by ABC. Mike and I enjoyed meeting him last week in person.

If you're in the mood for a romantic thriller, my mother-in-law Susan Rae has penned "Heartbeats", which has also received acclaimed reviews. Buy it here:

http://www.amazon.com/Heartbeats-Berkley-Sensation-Susan-Rae/dp/0425206823/ref=sr_1_2?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1214967647&sr=1-2

Graduation photos!

2008-06-26T19:14:00.001-07:00

Top: Me with Angela and Aminata
The other two are the UNC component of my class. Keep in mind there are 108 of us total spread all over the world. The UNC (United States-based) class is pictured here. The rest of us are based in business schools in Europe, Brazil, Mexico, and Hong Kong.

The best comic strip ever

2008-06-26T19:13:00.001-07:00

Ahmet and Crime

2008-06-22T18:25:00.000-07:00

Here is a photo of Ahmet and me during our last night in Shanghai. Ahmet was a particularly special colleague of mine from my first global team because our friendship blossomed from various conversations about life, love, and business. His Turkish background intrigued me, and his serious, reserved demeanor was often peppered by my terrible singing of They Might Be Giants' "Instanbul", cartwheels, and all sorts of debauchery in Europe. We shared a fantastic dinner in Rotterdam with enough food to serve the Romanian army, and I will always treasure our introspective conversations from the past two years.

On another note, Mike sat next to Jeffery Deaver on his flight back home from Denver on Saturday. Those two hit it off famously, and Jeffery invited the two of us to his book signing of "The Broken Window" on Monday evening in Raleigh. For those of you who don't follow psychological/crime thriller novels, Jeffery was the one who wrote "The Bone Collector", which was produced into a movie starring Denzel Washington and Angelina Jolie back in 1999. I'm looking forward to meeting the man behind the Lincoln Rhyme series.

One night in Shanghai

2008-06-18T16:52:00.000-07:00

Vickie and I saying our farewells the last night of our Asian residency in Shanghai.

I'm so excited I finally have a picture of my first global team!!! It was taken our very last night together in Asia and has been two years in the making, but better late than never! From left to right we have my dear Ahmet P (RSM), perpetually fun Juan Carlos (EGADE), my darling Brazilian Pitta (FGV), me, the talented Vickie Y (CUHK), awesome new papa Bob D (RSM), and kind-hearted Rajesh P (UNC). We were a crazy bunch who completed global projects in Strategy, Leading and Managing Global Operations, and Global Operations Management. We fondly referred to ourselves as the Bees and spent a fun-filled day in Amsterdam together back in March 2007 (where I almost keeled over out of exhaustion from a sleepless night).

Now to find a shot of my third and final global team.....

Random snippets

2008-06-17T16:43:00.000-07:00

I'm husbandless for the next week as Mike treks through Yellowstone and Canada with his papa. Normally this would be a great week to catch up on homework, but TADA! I don't have any! Thus, tonight I'll clean up the house a bit and finally catch up with the Netflix movies that have sat on my dresser for months. I have no idea what I'm going to do for the rest of the week aside from going out for a nightly run. What an odd feeling.

I worked a little too late to get a good run in while it was still light out. Drat.

Today I got assigned my first Six Sigma green belt project, which I'll get started on after the 4th. I'm excited! I've always been a fan of improvements, particularly when it comes to finance. It's my first big step towards my new certification.

The Droptops

2008-06-16T19:30:00.000-07:00

How has an entire year passed without my introducing the Droptops to my family and friends?? Eeesh! For you rockabilly fans, this is a traditional trio out of Rockville, Maryland. Mike thinks this year's BBQ at Pucketts wasn't as great as last year's due to the lack of this band, but I think it's because Mike has a thing for Christine and drums. :-)
Anyhooo, check them out in Hi Fi thru the toolbar on the left.

http://www.thedroptops.com

Catharsis

2008-06-16T19:09:00.000-07:00

To this day, nothing cleanses twenty-one months' of relentless study, pent-up aggression, and audaciously impudent hormones like pounding the pavement for 60 minutes. Laying it all out on the roads, the high rushing through my head leaves me exonerated and spritely. I longingly missed this physical exertion, this dance between the roads and my feet, in time to a hammer-on 4/4 legato purging the dominant staccato of stresses from the past few weeks, leaving behind nothing but visceral bliss. Every sinew radiates.

I have returned to you, my neglected Asics Gel Nimbus! It is time to get reacquainted.

Today I designed my workout/healthy balance plan to get back into the shape I was before I started school. I'm tired of being soft and having had exactly zero time to do anything about it. A curse upon thee, 3am single-serving Cherry Garcia tubs while completing exams!!!

By the time I fly out to the Dominican Republic at the beginning of January for my family winter vacation, I'll be ready. If only you could see my "grrr" face. It's time to work on the body now that the mind has done its job.

Simpsonized!

2008-06-04T20:48:00.000-07:00

Here I am at work and at play. Notice any resemblance?

The Straight 8s

2008-06-04T19:48:00.000-07:00

Check out one of my favorite rockabilly bands from right here in North Carolina. The lead singer of this band is a good friend of mine, lives right down the road from me....and happens to be Dutch. Doh! This is becoming too common a theme in my life lately. I've found I've been missing the Rotterdam architecture. What is it with me and the Dutch? Wait. Don't ask. Just take a listen to these guys. I'm looking forward to seeing them play live again this upcoming Saturday at http://rockabillybbq.com/ ! I had far too much fun last year. PBR me.

Eye Candy

2008-06-04T18:51:00.000-07:00

From one of my most favorite bands of all time.....I <3 Martin!

A favorite cover of a song from one of the most iconic bands and time period in history, IMHO.....with Nico of course.

I stayed awake for so many nights dreaming.....

Another favorite band of mine....

And be sure to check out some Meat Beat Manifesto, Plaid, Squarepusher, and Royksopp for something a little more......bizarre.

A change of tone

2008-06-04T18:31:00.001-07:00

Forgive me, readers, for I have sinned. It has been more than a fortnight or three since my last confessions. Wow, has school ever kept me busy! Since last we spoke I had visited Sao Paulo, BR and Monterrey, MX for school and then started this whole whirl of a career change. I now work for a large global company in a challenging (yes! finally!) financial leadership position. I am also working on my schedule to complete Six Sigma certification. A lot has changed in the last six months, and I somehow feel.....lighter. I haven't been able to stop smiling lately.

Anyway, I'm backlogged on posting, so here's another piece I wrote some time back. I am quite empathetic, so don't worry--nothing actually happened to me. But if it had, it would probably feel like this....I quite simply call this one "Todd".

A whisper, a glance, a thought-provoken stare.

Incriminating eyes I turn back towards you in hopes of
violently penetrating your most vulnerable orifice,
filling the void of morality inside you with utter
devastation.

You brought about this ecocide.

You walked into my being and proceeded to tarnish its
gleam with your oxidation greedy of lust. Any hope I
had left you dismembered and discarded its ash in your
icy waters of betrayal.

With your blunted, rusty butcher knife you etched a
scarlet letter on my innocence and minced every
passion I could ever fathom into your languid,
lackluster stew of mediocrity....

....never to stir, only to sit, until it cooled enough
to be eaten by apathy.

Where once in each of my windows a short, white candle
once burned, illuminating the trail of jubilation
hidden amongst the thicket of deception, you
extinguished the guides, one by one, and now nothing
inside me can find its way home.

I had worked so hard to build this elegant house of
infinite cards, but with one breath you leveled it
into a jumbled chaos of red and black.

How dare you even cast a glance in my direction? What
right do you possess?

With my own two hands I constructed a sturdy bridge of
oak. For years I spent endless, scorching days out
here building, my hands raw and crimson from the
splinters lodged in my flesh, persevering the agony to
construct a wonderous masterpiece.

You stood on the other shore calculating, and with the
flick of a single match, you burned it all down to the
very ashes it had once from arisen. Your hollow,
hideous, menacing laugh resonating amongst the flames,
I watched my very essence disintegrate into a wisp of
charcoal.

Now I am stone.

More dribble from my brain

2008-06-04T18:27:00.000-07:00

I scribbled this on a cocktail napkin the other day. The creative juices were flowing. Let's just say I was....inspired.

The gentle sashaying of wheat fields golden, scampering about in
the liquid warmth of vibrant Mother Earth's caressing
arms, the scent of dew-graced petals dancing around my
unshackled senses. Too much passion for some is a
downfall. For others, it is a welcome exile from
mundane, meaningless ritual, feeling utterly abandoned
singularity, yet simultaneously basking in the
knowledge of zen that most will never be lucky enough
to face.

As we all search for meaning within this
carbon-stamped, processed confection, restrain the
dappled, enigmatic, defined seeds we sow from within
ourselves from the fate of being ground into
homogenous texture.

I am in ecstasy, but I cry nonetheless, for I alone am
here, without another marred by the passion that I
feel for the acute petals of the crimson poinsettia,
the cascading sparkle of the frozen aquatic
masterpiece that winks at me outside my window, the
reassuring, dampened sweet whisper of the mid-July
evening enveloping all my senses, saturating them in
an endless, insatiable happiness.

I am here crying alone, yet not shedding lonely tears,
for this is my Society. And in my Society, intricacy
in simplicity is the greatest beauty of all. ---AGM

Untitled thoughts of mine

2008-06-04T18:16:00.000-07:00

Gratitude

2008-06-04T18:11:00.001-07:00

This is it. The final stretch. I have one paper to write and one speech to give and then yours truly will have completed her MBA in Global Business Administration with Beta Gamma Sigma honors. June 14th can't get here fast enough.

And yet, this sadness washes over me. With tear-stained cheeks I sit here, soft smile gracing my trembling lips, lost in the moment of realization that this chapter in my life is about to close. I'm going to miss these 107 other classmates of mine terribly. The conversations, the joys, the antics, the dreams, the adventures......

I don't think I'll ever experience two years like the ones I just lived. I have changed in ways I never thought possible.

Mahalo, class of 2008. I will never be the same because of you.

Me, circa 1979.

2007-12-06T17:30:00.000-08:00

I take time to play in the daisies. Dig my bonnet? Hope you all had a wonderful Thanksgiving!

P.S. My lip was bruised from my luxurious romp with an adobe sidewalk in Santa Fe, NM. I decided I was a sprinter that day, but the sidewalk tripped me on my way to winning my first 50-meter dash. My parents were not exactly excited by my face plant. That scab was on my lip for the entire rest of the summer.

Our house is buzzing...

2007-09-11T18:42:00.001-07:00

Over the past few weeks we have been able to identify a major deficiency Mike and I would be able to service. Over the next nine months, keep an ear to us. We've already bought a domain and are busy planning our interactive multimedia experience that will introduce our offering. Mike came up with the name, and it fits us perfectly! I'm really excited! What we have in our midst can not be easily imitated; thus, we're gleeful about the high barrier to entry. We plan to keep our day jobs while we develop our business, and it's far too early to speculate on anything. BUT, we can promise you it'll be hip, intelligent, and very "us". :-)

I <3 our German Shepherd!

2007-09-11T18:40:00.000-07:00

Yes, we're dog people. Cats not allowed.

Felix, you don't stand a chance

2007-09-06T20:24:00.000-07:00

Appears that Roatan still exists, so my hubby can still scuba with my brother while I'll be studying my fanny off in Brazil and Mexico in November. Just had a brilliant idea for a startup, as was confirmed by the hubby, so we'll be starting on our business plan pretty soon. Have a major finance assignment and thorough analysis of Molson-Coors to do before then.

Coming up for air

2007-08-28T18:27:00.000-07:00

Wow. Well, THAT was a fun two weeks. Just handed in a 25-page marketing paper and am busily chipping away at a macroeconomics regression. After the Feds threw us all for a loop with their lowering the discount rate, now I'm tasked with guessing their next move. Rock on. The past few weeks have been brutal. In between turning in 3 papers and one mid-term exam, I managed to sneak away with Mike to the Beach Boys concert for my birthday. We both preferred their opening act, Frankie Valli and the Four Seasons, though the Four Seasons all seemed a bit too young and pretty as Frankie's backdrop. Nonetheless, Frankie hit his iconic falsetto high notes, and I cheered in response. I've got this macro paper to write and some valuation problems to do for finance, and then I'm home free for Labor Day weekend. But until then, I have to learn to love my WACC as much as possible! See you all after Labor Day.

Lucky 13

2007-08-10T17:28:00.001-07:00

Here is a shot of my global team this mod. It was taken the first night of our Supply Chains and Sustainability residency in Rotterdam, the Netherlands. We have three total teams as we progress through the program. This is #2 of 3. From left to right, the members are:
Tall dude in back: Erik B of Utrecht, the Netherlands--supply chain manager for the parent company of Mentos. Just had a beautiful baby girl with his wife, so of course, I HAD to send a cute Strawberry Shortcake outfit.
Short dude in front of him: Scott D. Technical Director of AOL in Wash. DC. The biggest sweetie ever, even though his heart will always belong to the Wolverines. A curse upon thee, Michigan!
Female #1: Laetitia L from the Hague, Netherlands. Known to our class as "the dolphin lady", she is the founder of a pretty popular organization in Curacao that allows tourists to swim with the dolphins. I don't think I've ever known such a maven of dolphins even existed. Now I do. Her fashions are as colorful as her personality. Passionate, dedicated, committed.
Female #2: If you have to ask......and would you believe it, as I'm typing this I'm seriously considering a major shift in careers. Yes, I'm comtemplating getting out of accounting altogether. More on that another day--we have to see how the cards fall. This is not something that's just going to happen overnight.
Jovial dude next to me: Jason J., portal content specialist for Motorola in San Jose, CA. Dude is a friggin writing mastermind. I adore sitting next to him during our US-based classes, even though he constantly distracts me with his sharp wit and self-deprecating humor. I can certainly see his poli sci background. Reads people very well too. A corker.
Dude next to him: Jesus C from Mexico City. IT wunderkind. Excel warlord. This guy kicks some serious names and provides his thirsty teammates with the best Mexican tequila I've ever tasted. I'm so looking forward to our reunion in November in Sao Paulo.

Saludos! And that, my friends, is Lucky team #13.

Breezes on the back of my neck

2007-08-07T17:49:00.000-07:00

I chopped off all my hair. It was long past my shoulders, and I got tired of it. I pulled a Victoria Beckham and chopped it all off into a short, funky angled bob. Brightened up my complexion with complementary color in a mix of 7A and 7B. It's much more versatile now. I'm happy. The hubby......not so much. He'll live.

Can I have a bottle of dork with that?

2007-08-03T16:18:00.001-07:00

Sometimes I amuse myself. I may be the only one who understands my idiosyncratic humor, but some people actually do hear one hand clapping. Take my classmate, for example. He is a finance guru at a large financial institution. I have offered my help to tutor my classmates in accounting and told him over the phone this session would be too elementary for him. Yet, he decides to be a smartass. So I respond. Funny or not funny? You decide. Here is our email exchange. Names have been changed to protect the not-so-innocent.

________________________________

From: Accounting Rebel (me)
Sent: Fri 8/3/2007 12:02 PM
To: XXXXX
Subject: Reminder about accounting review session

Hola, class!
This is just a friendly reminder that the accounting review session I'll be hosting will take place this Sunday at 7pm eastern. I've only had three questions sent in so far, so please send me more! I'll accept questions in problem format until midnight tomorrow. Basically I've structured this as a review of fundamentals: what's debited versus credited, how the matching principle works, how timing affects cash flows, etc. If you have a pretty solid grasp of all the material, this is probably going to be too elementary for you.

Please make sure you don't ask me something that's too close to an exam problem. If you do, however, I'll change it significantly enough it can't be directly applied. If you understand the theoretical principle behind my example, then you should be able to complete the exam problem accordingly.

I have no idea where skill sets lie, so if you could forward me questions about well...pretty much anything....I'll have a better idea of how to frame the presentation without assuming too much or too little.

Thanks much, gang. See some of you on Sunday.

----Original Message-----
From: Banking Mastermind
Sent: Fri 8/3/2007 5:07 PM
To: Accounting Rebel
Subject: RE: Reminder about accounting review session

Can you please help explain the GAAP accounting for the derivative associated with a base metals commodities hedge assuming the price of lead (that you are holding in physical inventory) has increased dramatically over the last 90 days....

Just kidding. Hope you are well.

--Banking Mastermind

________________________________

My response:

You crack me up. Seriously.
I mean, c'mon. You know physical commodities inventory is valued at the lower of cost or market value. Didn't anyone tell you lead is soooooooooooooooooo 2004??? How passe that you would still own this in your physical inventory. Uranium is the way to go these days--sheesh! Anyway, I'm sure you're aware the price risk is mitigated through the use of derivatives. This price risk mitigation does not generally qualify for hedge accounting under GAAP. So no hanky-panky stuff. In such situations, unrealized gains in inventory are not recognized under GAAP, but unrealized gains and losses in related derivative positions ARE recognized under GAAP. As a result, the company's reported commodities trading earnings are subject to volatility. I'm sure that keeps you awake at night. Or at least it should. Just the suggestion of "volatility" anywhere is enough to make me shake in my britches like Ebeneezer Scrooge at a United Way meeting. Pass me the small cap international any day......

The bigger and more important question remains: Why am I still at WORK? Ack....time to jet.

Later I chided him for bringing up a FASB statement that was issued after I had finished my undergrad schooling. I don't have to go to all that CPE since I'm not in public accounting, so I'm about 10 years behind on some of the FASB and SFAS statements (not good ole GASB, though--I'm up-to-date on all my governmental accounting shizznit). Have any of you been to those sessions? One word: Snoresville.

Anyway, I sent him a link to FASB 133 just to be a smartass back. That'll learn 'im.

Rock, rock, rock around the clock

2007-08-02T20:41:00.000-07:00

Well, more like "study" around the clock, but that's a different story for a different day. In July Mike and I attended the Heavy Rebel Weekender in Winston-Salem and had the opportunity to consume much Magic Hat while listening to incredible local talent, including the Straight 8s, the Tremors, Jem Crossland and the Hypertonics, and Hick'ry Hawkins. They all have myspace pages--google em! The Straight 8s are one of our faves, and the lead singer lives just down the road from us.

Here's a pic of the hubby and the bookworm before we go out on night numero uno.

Paint by number

2007-07-30T18:56:00.000-07:00

This week I'm taking my accounting mid-term, which is a refresher of my undergrad fresh/soph material. I'm thirsting for greater challenge in accounting, however, so I plan on taking Advanced Financial Reporting after I graduate. The great thing about my program is that alums can take graduate-level courses after completing their MBA program for $300! Not just auditing the classes, but taking them for an actual grade. I'm seriously contemplating AFR and Advanced Corporate Finance, since I'm such a hardcore numbers geek. If anything, it will supplement my studying for the CPA exam. Yep, lo and behold, lil' miss "I don't want to be pigeonholed as an accountant for the rest of my life" is going to finally sit for the crazy thing six months after graduation. Hey, it can't hurt, right?

Today marks my official halfway point of my MBA schooling. Yeah! My flights for Brazil and Mexico have been booked to a tune way too expensive to talk about, but we all know one-way ticket prices blow. I can't wait to show the US and Brazilian immigration officers my one-way ticket to Sao Paulo. If that doesn't warrant a cavity search, I'll consider myself lucky. I don't plan on bringing any jewelry, nor my laptop, especially when I read reports like this: https://www.osac.gov/Reports/report.cfm?contentID=64850&print JOY! I confirmed this activity with a Brazilian employee at my company, and all I can say is: I want a bodyguard.

Meanwhile, my hubby is studying for the GMAT, which is equally painful.

My impending birthday of doom and a blast from the past

2007-07-28T21:30:00.000-07:00

What better way to spend my birthday than with my husband, Frankie Valli and the Four Seasons, and the Beach Boys? In four weeks, I'll be dancing with one while listening to the other two live! I can't wait.

We just scored tickets to the Cure show in Charlotte September 17th, which is a day after I come back from my classes in Washington D.C. A deserving reward, might I say.

Welcome to our circus!

2007-07-28T20:40:00.000-07:00

Hi there, and welcome! I'm a creative thrill-seeking accountant who is in the middle of her MBA schooling at a top tier global program while working full-time as the Controller of a design firm. My dashing husband is an innovative project manager for a healthcare services firm, as well the love of my life. Our marriage consists of rock shows, motorcycles, rockabilly, the bizarre, the unusual, the inquisitive, dreams, goals, passion, and learning. We have no kids, but we have a beautiful German Shepherd named Ruta. We prefer intellectual debate over reality TV, camping over pampering, country living over suburbia, and Magic Hat over Budweiser.

Thanks for visiting!